“What?” Max’s eye brows were scrunched together, and there was no longer a smile on his face. He was trying hard to understand what I was tellinghim.
“I used to have my own content editing business for romance authors. I stopped working about a year ago, but I thought I would pick it back up.” I tucked my hair behind my ears, swaying on my tiptoes. I looked down at my desk, staring at the closed laptop and thinking about all the words that were waiting for me. The ones that I wanted to devour. I watched as the laptop was opened and then spun around tome.
“Then do it.” It was my turn to look confused. That smug smile was back on Max’s face as he stood over my desk, offering me my laptop back. It wasn’t just that though, it was like he was offering me my life, the one that I got tochoose.
“Are you sure?” I was weary, only because I didn’t know how this wouldwork.
“As long as it doesn’t interfere with anything you do here, I don’t see why not.” Max came around the desk and pulled me into him, my back resting against his chest. We both stared at the computer screen in front of us, and I felt myself thinking about how this was exactly the way I had seen my life oneday.
“Thank you,” I whispered toMax.
“For what?” He kissed the top of my head, holding on to metighter.
“For believing in me.” Max turned me around. He held my face in hishands.
“Always.” He kissed my nose, which caused me to giggle. He was so perfect that I wondered if he was even real. “Just remember to give me a list of authors who you have workedwith.”
“What?” His request caught me offguard.
“I want to see your side of the book world. I’ve never ventured into romance, so it’s about time I start. I want to see the world you live and breathe.” It was like he hit the nail right on the head. The romance book world was my everything. Lilly and Adam were the only people not in the book world who knew how much I loved it. I went to at least two singings a month and spoke to authors on a daily basis, like they were my friends, and some of them were. I wanted to get back tothat.
“Come over for dinner later and I’ll show you what I have,” I offered. I knew Max was someone who could appreciate my book collection, and I wanted to see his face light up like I hoped itwould.
“Are you going to cook for me?” There it was again, Max’s eyebrow quirking up to match his question. We were still learning a lot about each other, but I felt like he didn’t think I could cook. I laughed a little. I hadn’t shown Max my skills yet, but I was hoping I would be able to impresshim.
“I’m actually a really good cook.” I could see the wonder in his eyes when I looked up at him. “I’ll surprise you with my favoritedish.”
“I look forward toit.”
* * *
Ifoundmyself rushing around the kitchen trying to get things ready for when Max came over. I had asked Chase if I could leave work an hour early in order to get started, and I had practically ordered Lilly to not come home tonight. She had laughed at me but thankfully agreed. My homemade sweet and sour chicken could take up to three hours to make, especially when I pan-fried the chicken myself. I was almost done with the second batch when I heard a soft knock on the door. I had told Max to wait a little bit when he got off before coming over, hoping that I could get changed into something more comfortable before he cameover.
I opened the door to Max holding a bouquet of honeysuckle. I had never seen an arrangement like it, with baby’s breath peeking through each blossom. I grabbed for the flowers to put them into a vase, holding the door open, so Max could enter the apartment. The smell made my mouth water, it was sweet and peaceful. Myfavorite.
“Lilly suggested them.” I heard Max take a seat at the kitchen table. I loved that he went to Lilly for advice on me, but I still wish he would ask me. I wanted to tell him my favorite flowers. “It also smells amazing inhere.”
“It’s almost done.” I bounced back into the kitchen. The chicken was starting to brown, so I stirred it a little more in the oil before dumping it out into a bowl and putting in a new batch. “I finally got my books onto mybookshelf.”
I pointed over to the wall next to the TV, where Max and Greg had set up the bookshelves last week. It hadn’t taken them very long, which benefitted me, because I wanted to see my babies again. I wanted to display them for everyone who cameover.
“Who do you recommend?” Now that was a hard question. I had my go-to authors, but to suggest one was a nightmare of adecision.
“Do what I do.” I turned around to see him already thumbing through one he had in his hand. “Choose the one with the most interestingcover.”
The chicken crackled behind me as I continued to watch him move amongst my bookshelves. He picked up a few here and there, perused them, then put them down. He picked another one up. I saw it in his eyes before he even knew it himself, that instant love. He flipped the book over, read the blurb, and then he did the one thing that sparked a madness in my heart. He flipped to the last page and readit.
“I love you.” The words came out of my mouth before I even knew how to stop them. Max’s head shot up so fast, I thought he would hurt himself. He kept the book open in his hands as he stood there staring at me. I thought his mouth would be agape, but instead his lips were pursed and I couldn’t read the expression on hisface.
I turned around, stirring the chicken again. I shouldn’t have said anything. I was stupid. I poured the last of the fried chicken into the bowl I had next to me. I had already made the sweet and sour sauce, along with the rice. I poured the sauce over the chicken, stirring it all together, and then placed it into the oven. Only another thirty minutes before I could shove my face with food so I wouldn’t say anything so stupid again. I still had my back to Max. He just stood there and stared at me. He didn’t even say anything back. He had been the one professing his love to me for over a month, and nownothing.
“You are credited as the editor of the book.” What he didn’t know was that he could have picked up any book by that author and seen my name in it. That was what I was proudest of while working in the book community. Finding new authors, helping them hone their craft, and watching them soar through the charts and have people flocking to their books. I turned around to see him on the edge of the kitchen, flipping through thepages.
“It’s also dedicated to me.” He looked up from the first chapter, where he held his finger, and then backtracked, looking for the dedication. He read it in silence but didn’t look up. He took the book with him back to where he was sitting at the table before and started to read. I turned back to the stove, my head racing more than before. I didn’t know what to do in this situation. Max was reading a book that I held dear to my heart, and I had just told him I loved him, but he hadn’t commented on either of these things. I felt out of myelement.
I tried to busy myself by opening the oven, tossing the chicken around in the sauce with some tongs, and then grabbing a bottle of rosé out of the fridge. I poured myself a glass and was halfway finished with it before the timer went off. I took the chicken out. I made bowls for both Max and me. I sat them on the table in front of Max, who still hadn’t looked up from the book he had in his hands. I ended up bringing the whole bottle of wine to the table, forgetting the glasses on thecounter.
I stuffed a few pieces of chicken into my mouth. The silence in the room was deafening. I took a sip out of the wine bottle, which caught Max’s attention. He put the book down and looked around the kitchen. I don’t think he realized dinner was even ready and that I had already started toeat.
