“How can I not make it about that?” He was closer to me now, and I was too scared to move. This was an Adam I had never seen before. His hands were fisted, and the anger that was blazing in his eyes before only grew stronger. “You stole the one thing from me that I thought we could have together.Now. Now we can’t even havethat.”
“Adam.” It was never intentional, but I didn’t know how to argue that. He was right, though. I had stolen our family away from us. Well, my bodyhad.
“Just stop!” He threw his hands in the air, and Iflinched.
“Don’t be mad at me!” I tried to wipe away a few of the tear streaks. “You’re the one who cheated, notme!”
“And you’re the one who can’t give me afamily!”
I took another plate out of the box, throwing it towards the house this time, and I let it crash against a beam. The shards flew through the air like a masterpiece I didn’t know I could create. There was chaos in this disaster and there was no coming out of it. I didn’t know how to come out of it. This was the one thing that had truly broken us, and at one point I thought we had gotten through it, that we had moved on, but clearly I was wrong. I didn’t know the mask that Adam had created on his face. I didn’t know the pain that still lived in both of ourhearts.
“Where are my things?” I wrapped my arms around my waist, trying to hold myselftogether.
“On a moving truck.” He waved off the answer like it wasn’t anythingnew.
“On a moving truck, but not here with your stuff? Ourstuff?”
“None of what’s in the moving truck is ours. Everything that was shared or yours is on its way. Everything in that truck.” He pointed over to the huge moving truck as movers took out box after box. “That’s what Natalie and I have been saving together for the last year. Everything in that truck is my new life. Everything in there has nothing to do withyou.”
I looked at him in horror, because it was finally hitting me. This hadn’t been some rash decision. This was something that was planned. This was something that I couldn’t have stopped even if I wanted to. This was something that we could never come back from, and I didn’t know if I wanted to. So I picked up the box of china next to me, and instead of handing it to Adam to bring into the house, to the new woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with, I cut open the bottom of it with my keys. I held the box steady before walking away, but when I turned away, I threw it to theground.
The box opened, and plate after plate shattered in front of him. If I couldn’t break him, at least I could break some of the life that they had created together, and that would probably be the most satisfaction that I could get out ofthis.
“I’ll be calling my lawyer tomorrow.” I had my back to him, but I knew he still heard thewords.
“Don’t worry. I’ve already called mine.” I took another step. “I already had the divorce papersdrawn.”
I kept walking. Tears continued to trickle down my face. The man I had spent college with, had fallen madly in love with, was telling me I wasn’t enough for him anymore, so could I be enough for anyone else? How could anyone love such a broken woman, one who couldn’t even give the simple satisfaction of a family? It didn’t matter how much I loved Adam. It didn’t matter how much I could love someone else. I would never come back from this. I didn’t pay attention to the sound of Adam’s voice coming from behindme.
Before I hit the curb, I stopped. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the note from Adam, because in the end it was curiosity that killed thecat.
“Why did you invite me here today?” When I turned around, the smirk that covered his face didn’t shock me. I had no idea what he had just been saying, but I knew the question I asked was just what he wanted. He wanted this to hurt me more. He wanted to drive itin.
“I wanted to talk to you about all of this. I wasn’t planning on screaming out here on my front lawn. Natalie wanted to make you dinner and for us to talk it out. Be civil about itall.”
I scoffed at him. Civil? This wasn’t civil, this wassadistic.
“You thought you could invite me to your home and that I would be okay with you cheating on me and wanting to leaveme?”
“Listen. We wanted to do this in the most adult way possible in order for us to all be happy in the end.” Happy? There was that word again. I certainly wasn’t the happy onehere.
“Who’shappy?”
“We are.” A voice came from behind the man standing in front of me. The woman who stood there was almost the spitting image of me, except for that blonde hair. What did she have that I didn’t? It was when I looked into those deep blue eyes that I knew what it was. The life that shone so bright, the one that sparkled only for him. I once had that sparkle, but now it was clear that past tense wasn’t enough forhim.
“Enjoy your happiness.” I watched as Natalie grabbed onto hisarm.
“Don’t leave, Alexa.” Adam tried to move towards me, but it wasn’t like Natalie was holding him back. She was holding him steady, as if he was the one who was breaking down. They looked like the picture-perfect family standing in the middle of theirlawn.
“You don’t get to tell me not to leave when you are the one who destroyed this marriage.” I recoiled as he tried to reach for meagain.
“At least let me take you to Lilly’s.” I stepped backwards, away from his enticing words, from the gentle whisper that was coming from his mouth. “Let me make sure you get homesafe.”
It was when he said “home” that I turned around. Leaving both Natalie and him standing there. He had considered Lilly’s apartment my home. He had already written my future for me. I shook as I walked away from the house, barely hearing the shouts coming from behind me, and that’s when it happened. Iran.
I ran like I had done so many other times this month, not knowing how I felt. Not knowing how to come out from all of this. I didn’t run to Lilly’s. I couldn’t. I couldn’t bear to tell anyone right now, because I knew inevitably that one day I would have to. I would have to tell my friends and family how my marriage failed, and that just wasn’t something I wanted to deal with right now. So, I ran to Max’s. The one person who I knew wouldn’t judge any of this. The one person who wouldn’t tell me it would all be okay.Max.
