‘Definitely. Vortex Command Racing is going to be the start of great things for us, Jäger.’
Lukas smiled. It wasn’t one of the heart-stopping smiles he had given her in Monaco, this one was practiced. Cordial and charming. No one would know the difference but her.
‘I couldn’t agree more, Matthew,’ Lukas said and watched the man leave. The door had only just closed when he rounded on Katherine. ‘We can talk in my office.’ He led her through the back doorway to a set of stairs. ‘I don’t need you making a scene.’
‘I would never do that.’ It hurt to hear him think that way of her.
‘Really?’ They reached the top and he held a glass door open for her to step into. ‘What would you call all those calls and messages, then?’
‘Wanting to talk.’
He closed the door, sealing them inside a small, impeccably neat office. He had two visitor chairs on one side of his desk and a large comfortable-looking one on the other, but he didn’t sit, nor did he invite Katherine to do so.
‘You had plenty of opportunities to talk but when it mattered, you didn’t.’
‘Can you at least say my name?’ It had been months since she’d heard him use it and all through the day he wouldn’t acknowledge her. Now he was talking to her yet still wouldn’t address her. It was tearing her up.
‘Why?’ he asked in a hard tone.
‘Because I need to hear it.’
He shook his head and walked past her to stand at the glass wall looking out at the sunny paddock.
‘Why are you here, Katherine?’
Every cell in her body came to life at the sound of her name on his tongue and she couldn’t savour it. ‘To ask for your forgiveness.’
‘My forgiveness,’ he scoffed.
‘I asked them to scrap the article and they ran it anyway without telling me. You know this. I tried to fix it, Lukas. Yes, I should have told you about it, but I never meant to hurt your feelings.’
‘Don’t lie.’ He turned towards her. Sadness, disappointment, hurt written all over his face. ‘That’s not true. Because the fact is you did write that article. You planned it, did research, thought of the words—the best words to get your point across—and then reread it before you submitted it.’
Katherine didn’t know how to defend herself against that because he had a point. There was always a lot of consideration in her writing. ‘You said you’d already seen all that I’d written, that we moved past the hate. Did you mean that?’
‘You don’t get to ask me that.’ Despite his even tone, there was anger in his eyes. ‘Are you proud of it?’
‘No!’ Katherine replied instantly. It was the least proud she had ever been of herself. No matter how disappointed Lukas was in her, it would never compare to how she felt about herself when she thought about how she had let her mistaken hate of him colour her judgement.
‘When you first wrote it, Katherine,’ he said slowly, ‘when you typed it up and put it on an email that you sent to your editor, were you proud of it?’
Her insides squirmed. How she wished she could go back to that moment and do it all over again because she had been proud. Exceptionally so. ‘Yes,’ she confessed. ‘But, Lukas, it isn’t like that. I’ve changed!’ She marched up to the man she loved and grabbed a fistful of his shirt, but his arms hung limply by his sides. He looked down at her, not pushing her away, but not touching her either. And even though it was the worst pain imaginable, she continued, ‘I see you for who you are. I was wrong and I’m sorry, Lukas. I’m so sorry!’
He stepped back, forcing her to let go. ‘You don’t get it. You did believe the things you wrote about me even if you no longer do. You were willing to believe the worst about me without ever talking to me or finding out the truth. You can only believe the worst about someone if youwantto.’
‘Lukas…’
‘And you didn’t just believe it,’ he went on. ‘You kept telling the world. You wanted everyone to think of me as you did. And even though you attacked me over and over again, I never said a bad thing about you, Of course, I vented to Dominic or my father because I am human after all. But not publicly, ever. Not once, Katherine.’
Her eyes welled with tears because he was right.
‘I never once did the things you did.’ He walked to the door and grabbed onto the handle about to pull it open but she stopped him.
Tears she couldn’t control streamed down her cheeks. ‘I’m not doing the column anymore.’
She could see that caught his attention. He let go of the door handle and turned towards her even though he remained at a distance.
‘I’m done with opinion pieces.’
