“Sure, rub it in. So what? I should just get over it?”
“Of course not. Fuck knows, I wouldn’t, but are you really that scared to take a chance on him? He’s a good guy.”
“I know.” Kage sighed. “He should find someone stable, maybe older.”
“Is the great Master Kage in doubt?” Mat sniggered.
“You’re such an asshole, Mat.”
“Yup. And I survived an absolute mindfuck only thanks to Peyton. And he taught me to say what’s on my mind to prevent me from spiralling into a bad headspace. So, if you want my advice—”
“I don’t.”
“Then get your head out of your ass and tell Finley how you feel. That you want to wake up next to him and kiss his nape first thing in the morning.”
Kage sputtered. “How thefuckwould you know that?”
Mat’s chuckle at the other end of the connection was infectious, making Kage smile. “Jezu Chryste,Peyton, what the hell are you doing? I’ll get—”
The line went dead, and Kage shook his head in amusement.
Okay. He needed a plan.
Head out of ass. Tell Finley how he felt. Pursue Finley even at the risk of a broken heart. He had to try, whatever might happen.
It had been a day of analysing every conversation Kage had with Finley to date, and at least two jerking off sessions as a result. He had to keep his head straight and his dick in his pants to tackle being open and honest with Finley about his past and therefore, reasons for his behaviour.
Now, at quarter to eight, Kage entered the bookstore and took the escalator to the top floor where the café was located. He ordered two teas and sat in the seventies-style dark orange chair. Crossing his legs at the ankle, he gazed through the floor to ceiling window overlooking the street below. Finley was walking towards the building, and the setting sun played on the harsh features of his face. It created the view of a warrior angel—one that could tempt him to taste the fruit of his devotion, even if it meant he may spiral into hell soon after.
A server brought the tea a moment before Finley approached the table.
Calm and honest. You can do this.
“I ordered you tea. It’s still hot.” Kage indicated the chair opposite him then turned to Finley.
Kage’s breath caught every time he saw Finley, and he wanted to shoot to his feet and pull him into his arms to feel his heart beat against his chest, to smell his musk.
Finley looked like a lumberjack who’d just taken a shower. His thick thighs trapped in tight jeans could crush watermelons for ThirstTok, and the work boots and casual flannel look added to his “I can fix your table or break your hole” vibe. Except he preferred to bottom.
His fiery hair was windswept back, complementing the dusting of sexy ginger stubble on his face. He looked good enough to eat. Ass or cock. Anything. Kage could make a buffet out of him.
Finley took a seat and pulled the saucer with his cup closer. “Thank you.” His shoulders were straight and his expression far from defeated.
He wasn’t here to fight. At least notwithKage but maybeforhim.For us.
Kage inhaled sharply as a realisation slapped him in the face. Was it possible they were on the same page? Hopefully so.Because he could never, ever go back to the way his life was before Finley.
A gaze full of hope and resolve landed on Kage.
“I acted like an idiot after our last scene and I’m sorry,” Finley said. “I didn’t realise where we stood. Before you say anything, I need to know if you’re building a wall between us. Or rather strengthening the one you put up at the start. I only want to know what to expect.” He flicked the tiny sachet of sugar to the side.
So you wouldn’t get hurt.
Fuck, he called their last sex a scene. Finley was slipping through his fingers, trickling like sand. Soon there would be nothing left and he’d be gone for good. Not in the same form. If Kage couldn’t be honest and bare his soul tonight, he might lose him forever.
“That’s understandable.” Kage cleared his throat. His entire planned speech went out the window and now he was processing what to say to keep Finley in his life.
“I can’t keep wondering if you hate me or—” Finley swallowed. “I’m fine with just sex, or friendship. But please don’t give me the illusion there might be something more and then shut me out.”
