“You fell in love with them,” Connor said.
“Yes, I did.” I nodded. “And they fell in love with me. For a while, it was incredible.”
Connor’s jaw tightened and I got the impression he didn’t like the idea of me having anything incredible with anyone other than him and Gabi. “What happened?” he asked.
“I’m not sure when it began to fall apart, but they started to become too focused on me. I think because I was the new person, the novelty.” I had no other way of explaining it. “They began to lose sight of their love for each other. He became jealous and accused me of loving her more than him. She claimed he was right and suggested they should rethink their marriage, so she’d be free to be with me. It was awful. They were falling apart, and it was my fault.”
Connor shook his head, running a soothing hand up and down my arm. “You can’t blame yourself for other people’s actions. The only person you can control is yourself.”
I knew he was right in theory, but a big part of me still had trouble believing it. “They were happy before they met me.”
Gabi’s hand cupped the back of my neck, drawing my attention to her. “They obviously needed something more, or they wouldn’t have invited you into their lives in the first place,” she insisted. “It didn’t work out, but you’re not at fault for trying.”
Connor reached for Gabi’s free hand and she reached back for him without thought. The sight gave me hope the three of us were better suited to this life we were attempting to live.
“It hurt, breaking up with them,” I continued. “We were together for about six months and they were my first real relationship, and as it turned out my longest one, too.”
“Do you know what happened to them after you left?” Gabi asked.
I nodded. “I still run into him at workshops and conferences from time to time. We have coffee. It’s all on the right side of friendly now. Those feelings we had for each other, they’re long gone. But the two of them managed to work everything out and they’re still together, and happy. They even have a kid,” I added, smiling. I would never forget the relief I’d felt the day I discovered I hadn’t ruined their marriage for good. Whatever had happened between us, they were good people and I wanted them to be happy. “After it ended, I promised myself I would never get involved in an established relationship again. I don’t want to be the reason two people lose each other. I don’t want to hurt anyone like that.”
Gabi tilted her head to one side as she narrowed her eyes at me. “Are you saying, if Connor and I had started dating earlier, you would have left the door at the hotel locked?”
Wincing, I ran a hand over my face. “I know I’m supposed to say yes, but honestly, there’s not a chance in hell I would have done anything differently there,” I admitted. “When it comes to the two of you, it’s like all bets are off. I’ll take you any way I can have you.”
“But that’s why you kept telling us you wanted the two of us to be together, over and over, wasn’t it?” Connor guessed.
“Yes,” I groaned. “This doesn’t work for me if you don’t love each other, but I know I’ll never walk away, not from us. I’ll fight to the death to keep you two together. So, don’t get any ideas about breaking up,” I said, pointing a finger at each of them, “because I won’t allow it.”
Connor swung his gaze towards Gabi. “You hear that, Gabs? Apparently, we aren’t bonded securely enough for Law’s peace of mind.”
Snickering, Gabi crawled straight over the top of me so she could straddle Connor’s lap. He put his hands on her barely covered arse and pulled her more firmly against his groin.
“Maybe we should show him exactly how deeply bound together we can get,” she crooned, her arms sliding around his neck. “To put his fears to rest.”
They were both smiling like idiots as they moved against each other, their mouths meeting in slow, languorous kisses. Laughing, I threw a pillow at them. “Fuck, you know I love the hell out of you two, right?”
Gabi lowered herself to one side until her body draped across my lap, her legs still around Connor’s waist. She grinned up at me. “I think we may have noticed.”
Connor’s hands sneaked under her t-shirt to cup her breasts, the tip of his thumbs circling her nipples, and she sighed in pleasure. Just like that, we were making love again. I liked to think of it as making love. Even though neither of them had said they loved me. They’d professed their love for each other, and I’d done the same to each of them, but I had yet to hear it back.
It stung, that absence of words, but I could wait. As long as we were together, we had all the time in the world for the rest to fall into place.
TWENTY-FOUR
______
GABI
“It all sounds so glamorous.” The young woman who had monopolised Connor’s time and attention from the moment they were introduced reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear, smiling at him with glossy, red lips. “Travelling to exotic locations, meeting the world’s most celebrated designers. Do you love every minute of it?”
Connor gave her a patient smile. “It has its moments, but I don’t think anyone could enjoy posing for a Spring catalogue on the edge of the Thames in the middle of an English winter,” he said with a laugh. “I was lucky to make it out of that one with all my body parts intact.”
The bottle-blonde laughed lightly, her hand fluttering across the swell of her breasts in an obvious attempt to draw Connor’s attention in that direction. Rather than following her lead, he took a sip of his water, looked directly at me and winked.
A snort sounded behind me and I looked over my shoulder to see Law standing at my back, close enough I could feel a hint of his body warmth, but not close enough to raise eyebrows from any of the people crowding into Frank and Caroline’s living room.
“Who is she?” Law asked, lifting his chin in the direction of Connor’s current companion.
