My breath stalls in my throat, and I speak before I think better of it.
“How long should it take?”
He takes a step closer to me. “If you have to ask, then you’re doing it wrong.” He lifts my chin to close my mouth with the underside of his finger. I didn’t know it was even down. But as my jaw locks in place, he slowly moves his finger, the one that just touched my skin, to his lips and licks it, then bites the part he licked.
I shake my head, trying to… well… shake me out of whatever just happened. I have to have imagined it. That couldn’t have happened. Right? I mean, it’s almost as if Kooper was coming on to me. Tasting me. Looking at me with want and desire.
But when I look back at him, I don’t see any of it but his tilted head.
I must have imagined it.
I’m going crazy. First with Dad dead, and then finding out about Abigail’s betraying me and the club, my brain is taking a nosedive into whatever it needs to so I can get through this. I feel hurt all over, and I hug myself tight to try and will myself not to break apart and scatter across the ground.
“What do you want, Koop?”
He moves his head from one side to the other and looks me over. Nothing sexual, just assessing. I hate it because I know he sees more than I want. He doesn’t just see me closing myself off like everyone else does. I swear to Christ, he can see my inner child crying and rocking herself in the corner with a stuffie.
“Need some physical therapy. The Russia trip fucked up my hip and shoulder. General wants me to get it worked on so I’m not out of commission. I don’t have insurance, thought you’d be willing to help. Could get you the practice you need.”
I bite my lip. “Can’t the club cover the cost of the PT?”
He shrugs. “Don’t know. Figured I’d come to you. If you can’t do it, then I can do it on my own. No need to waste club money on me.”
I glare. He’d rather hurt himself than take money. Typical biker. “Fine. I’ll do it.”
He nods and heads out.
I tell myself the glint in his eye was me seeing things. And the flutter in my stomach is just because I’m hungry. Nothingmore.
Chapter 19—Kooper
This is a bad idea. It has to be. Anything that makes me second-guess what I’m wearing is probably the worst idea I’ve ever had. I even freaking googled what to wear. Me. A guy who gives zero fucks about anything. I spent twenty goddamn minutes looking up what’s best to wear to physical therapy.
Loose-fitting clothing.No shit.
But still, I dug through my clothes and found some I felt comfortable in. You know, ones that are soft to the touch for anyone to feel. The kind that are tight enough to show my definition without it looking like I’m trying to show off. Some that bring out the color of my eyes.
Yeah, I threw something across the room at that last thought. I would puke if I could at how stupid I’m acting, but I haven’t eaten this morning. I read somewhere that PT can lead to expressing yourself in other ways. Last thing I want is to fart when Ruby has my legs spread and her face close.
And yeah, I looked up what some of the moves are going to be. This will be a testament in strength, I know. I also hope that it helps expel whatever it is I’m feeling toward her. If I get her close for a bit, have that feeling, then I can just get it over with and go back to wanting her out of my way.
Again, I know how stupid that sounds. I’m not fooling anyone, not even myself anymore. I want her.
I want Ruby.
Still can’t have her, though. And that’s what I need to focus on to get over this so I can move on and live life beyond all this bull.
I drive to her work. She prefers to do this where someone can step in if she messes things up. Though I doubt she’s the type to. If I spent twenty minutes looking up how to dress, I know she spent hours researching how to do the moves properly. That’s just the way she is. She never does anything half-assed.
I wish I had my bike, but I read that some people are sore after these sessions. I don’t need to cause further issues by straddling a bike after I was just stretched wide.
“Can I help you?” a young kid asks as I walk in.
There doesn’t seem to be anyone else here. Not sure if that means this place sucks or that it’s just a time that no one wants to come. 8:00 a.m. is a bit rich for my blood, too, but it was all Ruby gave me. She called yesterday, told me the address and the time of the appointment, and then hung up. Never took any of my calls when I tried to get a different time.
She thinks it’s an issue for me. That I would be the type to sleep in because of a long night of drinking or something. What she doesn’t know is that I had to switch shifts at the gate for this, andthatwas the headache. Nothing more, nothing less.
“I got him, Alister.” Ruby comes out from the back hall, and I just stare. I’ve never seen her in professional attire before. Her pink scrubs are tight in so many places and loose in others.
