"You don't know that," I argue, my cheeks heating.
"Yeah, I do," she says sadly. "I know it because I know you, and I know how much this place means to you. If he's the one who takes it away, it'll be a wedge between you. We both know that's why you two aren't really talking about it."
"So what? You think I should call the whole thing off? Tell him that we're never going to work and walk away now?"
"No." She shakes her head. "I think you need to call your dad and ask him—"
"I'mnotcalling my dad."
"Then you're setting yourself up to lose your building and the first man who has ever left stars in your eyes," she says. "You deserve better than that. You deserve happiness, the store of your dreams,andthe man of your dreams."
"We can't all have everything," I mutter defensively.
"I know, but if you aren't careful, you're going to end up with nothing but a broken heart and a lifetime of regret. Don't do that to yourself," she advises, and then stands upright as the bell over the door jingles and Paisley and Zoya Goodson, two of Lucy's cousins-in-law, sweep through the doors. "You deserve more."
I watch her sashay across the store to greet Paisley and Zoya, chewing on my bottom lip. Part of me wants to shout that she's wrong, and I'll handle everything just fine. But…I know better, as much as I don't want to admit it. When Lincoln takes the store, it's going to crush me. I don't want to be the kind of person who holds it against him. It's not like he knew how much thebuilding meant to me when he placed a bid on it, but…I'm not sure how I'll feel once the deed is done.
I don't want a different building. I want this one, the one I chose because my bookstore felt like it belonged right here—where bookstores have stood damn nearly constantly since the 1930s.
But I want him too—in a way that I've never wanted anything.
How am I supposed to lose one and keep the other without splitting myself and my heart in two?
Chapter Seven
Lincoln
By the time I finish up with the mayor and city council, I'm half an hour late for my usual lunch with Lilah, and I'm irritated. Politicians annoy the fuck out of me. They use a whole lot of goddamn words to say very little of value. And what they do say is rarely true.
Frankly, I'd rather deal with the devil himself than a politician. Unfortunately for me, dealing with them is a necessary evil in a project like this.
I step through the doors toBook of Love, ready to see Lilah again and forget all about my morning. We've spent the last three nights together. They've been the best goddamn nights of my life. Falling asleep with her in my arms is perfection.Sheis perfection. As soon as she leaves for work in the morning, I'm looking forward to lunch, just so I can see her again.
Jackson is hounding me, wanting to know when I'll be back. I've just been blowing him off. Frankly, I'd rather be right here than anywhere. I'd rather be in her bed, learning every little thing about her, than in San Francisco. She's starting to feel like home to me, in a way nothing has since my mom died.
It worries me that she's avoiding talking about the building, though. I've tried to bring it up a few times, but she finds a way to distract me every single time, almost like she's afraid that talking about it will ruin what's growing between us. That worries the fuck out of me because she isn't someone who avoids problems.
I find Jasmine behind the counter, watching me like she'd rather choke me with my tie than let me take her best friend to lunch. She does not like me much, or at all, really.
"She's not here," she says before I can say anything. "She ran to pick up lunch for you guys. She said that you're supposed to wait."
"Do you mind?" I ask, not entirely sure she'll agree. When we cross paths, she usually glares for a while and then finds somewhere else to be.
She just grunts in response, lifting her book like it's a blockade meant to halt any further conversation. Clearly, she's slower to forgive than Lilah. Not that I really blame her or anything. I appreciate that she's protective of her friend.
"You know, I don't want to run you guys out of business," I murmur, trying to soften her up a little. "That was never my intention. If she makes a bid on the store, I won't try to outbid her."
I'm not sure when I decided that. Somewhere between kissing her for the first time and eating her on the sofa after dinner the other night, I think. Hell, maybe I decided it on day one. I don't know. But it feels like the right thing to do. If she bids, we'll go with Plan B or Plan C, or whichever plan keeps her in my life. I need her more than I need this building.
I floated the idea with the mayor and city council during our meeting this morning. They aren't entirely opposed to making everything at street-level office space, with the floors above reserved for condos. Frankly, I think they'd rather do it that way, even if it means keeping Lilah's building intact. It'll generate more foot traffic and more revenue.
I still have to get investors on board, which means they can still sink the idea. But I'm determined not to let that happen.
Jasmine lowers the book, glaring at me over the top. "She isn't putting in a bid."
"What?" I blink, sure I misunderstood.
"I said, she isn't putting in a bid. You're going to take this place from her, and she's going to let you," Jasmine says, still glaring at me. "Why do you think she's avoiding the subject? She can't afford the price you set. If she could, she would have bought it already."
