Hanna stopped, and so did Maya.
“Let’s not make a thing out of it,” Lily said as she kept walking.
Hanna looked at Maya, and Maya shook her head slightly before moving to catch up with Lily.
After that, Hanna attempted to lighten the mood with silly questions about sex positions and the silliest things each womanhad ever done. Hanna could tell Lily was trying to keep on that theme as they neared the house.
“When was the last time you missed being together, the three of us?” Lily asked, a hint of flirtation in her voice. “I’ll go first, the night before you both got here I def had to rub one out so I didn’t jump both of you as soon as you got here. I was thinking about our last video call and couldn’t fall asleep.”
“I couldn’t sleep either, I was just excited to see you both finally,” Hanna said.
“That’s all you’re going to give us? Come on Banana,” Lily said, turning to Maya, who was looking down at the ground. When Maya didn’t look up she said, “You, insatiable Banana? All you did was be excited and go to sleep?”
“Yep, some of us can hold out and wait,” Hanna said without thinking. She hadn’t meant anything by it, but she had spent most of her life waiting. Wanting. She knew how to do without. Lily’s smile faltered for a second but before Hanna could try to smooth over what she said, Maya looked up.
“New Year’s,” Maya said seriously.
“You mean you wish you could have smooched us?” Lily asked.
“No–I mean sure, but no, New Year’s Day,” Maya said. “I had just cleaned the house and gotten my mother’s laundry done. She was still in bed, and I realized I hadn’t gone out. I spent the night trying to distract my mom that her “new beginning” was happening without my dad. I thought I would be relieved once they divorced, when I didn’t have to walk on eggshells at home. Getting them to talk to me was like pulling teeth, getting them to talk to each other was impossible. I felt like I was this broken light system trying to guide them through a storm. I had this moment where I stood in my kitchen that morning and realized how exhausted I was, just emotionally tired. So fucking tired, so bored, so lonely. And then, I thought of the treehouse and howI felt wrapped up in both of you and I got the urge to call you both.”
“Why didn’t you,” Hanna said. They were nearing the house now.
“I figured you two had gone out and maybe–well, either way, I closed my eyes and I thought of waking up in the morning with you two, and then I made breakfast.”
19
MAYA
Maya hadn’t meant to bring the mood–that Hanna and Lily had so obviously been trying to rescue and revive with levity–back down. A heaviness settled around them. Back at the house they showered to warm up, and Hanna insisted on making grilled cheese sandwiches once she discovered the pantry contained tomato soup.
After a relatively subdued dinner, they realized they had some hours left before bed. With the current mood, it was a chunk of time that loomed over them. “We can watch a movie?” Lily said, moving them into the living room and picking up the remote. Maya nodded and Hanna mumbled her agreement. “OhBridesmaids, just what we need,” Lily said, selecting a film.
“Wait,” Hanna said, looking around the space. “That couch looks comfy but, how cool would it be if we built a movie fort?”
“A what?” Lily said, turning to look at Hanna.
Maya felt a smile relieve the tension in her face. “Oooh I like that idea, this way we can all sit facing the TV.”
“If we grab a laptop we’d have to snuggle,” Hanna said.
“Or we can just watch TV? I’m still unclear as to what you’re asking,” Lily said, and she sounded genuinely confused.
“You know, when you were little, didn’t you ever build a little fort and watch movies or play games or read in it?” Maya asked, but then realized too late that was a stupid question.
“My parents tiptoed around the fact that my dad was actively banging someone else…” Lily responded.
“Right, so,” Maya said, turning to Hanna, “we are going to have to just show her. Lily, where do you keep the extra blankets?”
Maya and Hanna took the lead, and took the extra blankets Lily brought to them and began building a fort, using pillows and extra chairs from the kitchen so they could build a makeshift roof of sorts. Lily just watched, her blue eyes tracking their movements as if she was trying to put together a puzzle.
“Ok,” Hanna said, “hand me your laptop?”
“We also have an iPad somewhere,” Lily added.
“Too small,” Maya and Hanna said together. While Lily was a ceramics major, she also did design work on the side and had a laptop with a large screen. She momentarily left the room to grab it and then reappeared with a bottle of wine.
“No glasses?” Hanna asked teasingly.
