That's why. There was a tapping on the glass of her window. Again and again. She frowned. Was it hailing? She hoped not. hail would ruin all the paper lanterns people had made.
Throwing herself back down on the pillows, she closed her eyes again. her head felt muggy with sleep so maybe she was just imagining it?
Nope, there it was again. A light tapping. Something was definitely hitting the glass of her bedroom window. she rubbed her eyes and forced herself to get out of bed. She see what it was and then go back to sleep.
After crossing the room to the window, she drew back the curtains and blinked against the warm white lights of the Christmas lights from outside. As she stood there, she watchedas a cluster of tiny stones hit the window, each one clattering against the glass. What on earth?
Pulling open the window, the noise from the lantern parade in full swing reached her, the tune from the brass band, the sound of hundreds of voices singing Away in a Manger at full volume. She closed her eyes. She'd always loved that carol. She'd sung it in her primary school choir and somehow it had always made her feel closer to her mum.
'Merri!'
Opening her eyes, she looked down and gasped. It was Felix. He was standing in the middle of the road, his hands cupping his mouth as he called her name. As a bundle of emotions - loss, sadness, anger - flooded through her, she went to close the window, pausing as he shouted up again.
'Please, Merri. just give me five minutes. Five minutes of your time. that's all.'
She narrowed her eyes into the dim street. She could make out his figure, but not the expression on his face. 'And you'll stop calling me? texting me?'
'Yes. I promise.'
'Fine. Go on, say what you need to.' She crossed her arms.
'Can't you let me in?' Felix shouted again.
'No. You can tell me what you what from there.' She couldn’t let him in. She just couldn’t.
'Okay. Look, Merri, I know what you heard. I know you overheard me telling Janet that I was leaving the farm. I know you overheard me telling her I didn’t have any reason to stay.' Felix paused. 'Can you hear me okay?'
'I can hear you.' She shouted back down to him before leaning against the windowsill. She didn’t want to hear those words again. She didn’t want to hear him saying he didn’t have a reason to stay. She'd already heard them.
'It was because...' his voice was drowned out as the brass band reached a crescendo.
'What?' She frowned. Did it matter anyway? Was there really anything he could tell her which would make up for what he'd said?
'It was because...' Once again, the brass band drowned out his voice.
She rolled her eyes. This was daft. She didn’t want to stand here int he cold breeze all night whilst he tried to shout above the noise outside. She’d have to go down and let him tell her face to face. At least then she could tell him to leave, and she could go back to hiding beneath the duvet cover.
Pushing herself away from the windowsill, she walked slowly downstairs and through the dark bakery to the front door. After pulling it open, she stood in the doorway watching him as he shouted up towards the window again. he hadn’t realised she'd moved.
'I said it was because I hadn’t heard your voicemail. I didn’t know Nick had given you job. I didn’t know you were staying.' Stepping back a little further, he craned his neck up again, searching the window above. 'Did you hear me that time?'
'I heard you.' As soon as she'd spoken, Felix turned his attention from the window to her and hurried forward, pausing a few steps away.
'I hadn’t heard your voicemail. Nick hadn’t mentioned he was offering you a job and I thought I might as well go home rather than staying on at the farm amongst all the things which now reminded me of you.' He took a tentative step closer. 'I hadn’t mentioned my intentions to Nick when I was speaking to Janet. If I had, I'm sure he would have told me about the job offer.'
'You hadn’t heard my voicemail.' She frowned. was he telling the truth? 'But you had your phone on you. You'd sent me a text message to cancel meeting up.'
'I know. I messed up, I missed it. I didn’t see your voicemail before I sent the message. I didn’t see your voicemail until you'd gone.' He ran his fingers through his hair.
'You really didn’t. You didn’t mean what you said about not having anything to stay for?' She swiped at the tears cascading down her cheeks.
'I didn’t know you were staying. I didn’t think they'd be any difference if I moved back home as I thought you were too. In fact, we'd have been closer to each other. I always wanted a relationship with you, Merri. I'd assumed it would be long distance, to begin with anyway, but whatever happened I always wanted one with you. I always want to be with you. I love you, Merri.' His voice cracked as his ran his hand across his face.
'You do?' Had he really said that?
'I do. I really do. I love you and I want to spend every moment I can with you.' He took another step forward.
Leaving the relative warmth of the bakery, Merri ran barefoot across the cobbles and into his open arms. As she felt his arms envelope her, she looked up into his eyes. 'I love you too, Felix.'
