I scoffed. “Got what I wanted? What I wanted was a mother who gave a damn about me. I wanted a normal childhood. I wanted to not be raped repeatedly by a sick, perverted ass man who got me pregnant. You know what he told me when I miscarried? That we would be careful next time. He never planned to stop, and you weren’t going to make him. How can you live with yourself? Do you sleep well at night knowing what you’ve done—how you’ve ruined my life?
“How can you sit here and look me in the face knowing that you eventually knew I was telling the truth and not feel a single ounce of remorse? Were you so desperate for a man to love you that you could overlook something so sick? Was your hate for me that strong?”
She just stared at me. I looked at her in disbelief. I wasn’t sure why I was shocked. Kennedy Chambers didn’t have a remorseful bone in her body. She would never own up to her wrongdoings. It would always be someone else’s fault. I was fighting a lost cause.
“I don’t even know why I’m here,” I said, shaking my head. “Since I ruined your life, let me ruin it a little more: I won. My conviction was overturned, and my record will be expunged. My sisters and I now have a beautiful relationship, and you will never see them again. You’re here, and I get to go home to my family and a man who loves more than I ever imagined.
“I have the brightest future ahead of me while you will spend the rest of your life in prison. All the hate in your heart for me ruined you. You can’t blame that on anybody but yourself. I’m done being your punching bag. I’m done letting you, Rodney, or anybody break me. I may be bruised, but I am far from broken. You…don’t…win. Have a nice life, bitch.”
I hung up the phone and stood from the seat. As I walked away from the glass, I felt a sense of pride. I didn’t get the closure I wanted, but I got what I needed. I had indeed won in more ways than I could ever imagine.
As I made my way to the door, I locked eyes with two familiar faces. CO Judy and Carissa. Both smiled when they saw me. Carissa mouthed something I couldn’t hear to Judy who motioned for me to pick up the phone.
“My baby,” Carissa exclaimed. “Oh, I miss you.”
“I miss you, too, Riss. How are the girls?”
“Same shit, different day. You look so good, baby.”
“Thank you. I’m fully free now, so I can come back to visit you.”
“I saw the news. I’m so happy you finally got justice. But don’t come back here, Alayah. Ain’t nothing good inside these walls for you, baby. I miss you, and I love you, but I knew there was better for you on the outside.”
“Carissa… I love you. You loved and protected me for ten years. How am I supposed to forget about you? Can I at least write you?”
She smiled. “I’ll take a letter. I knew you would be fine. I finished raising you to be a tough cookie. I ain’t your mama, but a little of me rubbed off on you. You are glowing right now. You got a man out there, don’t you?”
Just as I went to answer, Kennedy was escorted past us. She glared at me, and I glared at her until she was gone. When my eyes landed on Carissa again, she gave me a knowing look.
“I got you, baby,” she said.
“Riss—”
“I love you, Lay Lay.”
“I love you, too.”
She hung up the phone and looked to CO Judy who gave me a nod. I hung up the receiver and left the visitation center. Back in the car, I sat there for a moment, waiting on the tears to come again, but they never did. It was like my brain said,Enough of that.
No more tears.
No more worry.
No more pain.
It was time to move on with life. While so much had been taken from me, I’d gained so much in return. I couldn’t afford to look back. I was leaving my past right here to rot with Kennedy because I had no room for it in the future I was trying to build.
With that thought, I cranked up and pulled out of the parking lot. There was a celebration happening, and I was the guest of honor. What better way to celebrate my freedom than to be surrounded by the very thing that got me through my toughest times—love.
Epilogue
Alayah
A Year and a Half Later
“She’s here,” I yelled from the front porch.
I was giddy with excitement as my sister came down the road. Adrienne been away at school for months now, and I was too excited to see my baby. The day she left for college was bittersweet for me. I felt like I had just gotten her back, then she was leaving.
