“Don’t say sorry, I’m sure it’s fun. I mean, you already basically lived there anyway.”
“Well, Will’s happy about it. Sue’s a different story… But listen, I’ll call Chris and see if he can pull some strings.”
“Thanks so much,” I said.
She was back on the phone a few minutes later with the bad news: “They’re all full. But I talked to Will and Sue and we came up with a solution.”
She sounded bubbly, and I thought I could sense where this was going. “Naya…”
“Just come live with us!”
“But…”
“No buts! We’re all friends, and now there’s an empty room!!”
“Yeah. An empty room that belongs to my ex-boyfriend. I can’t!” I protested.
“Jenna, come on… It’s been almost a year since he was last here. He’s probably settled in, ready to make France his home. Do you honestly think he’s just going to show up now?”
“With my luck, yeah.”
“You want me to text him and ask?”
“Naya, it’s not just that I’m worried he’ll come around, it’s that I don’t want to sleep in his room. It’s intrusive. It’s weird. If someone did something like that to me, I’d be furious.”
“Whatever…” she replied. “How about if we bought a sofa bed? It would at least give you somewhere to crash while you’re looking for a room… Chris told me if something opened up at the dorm, he’d call right away.”
We talked on and on for probably an hour, and predictably, Naya wound up convincing me it was a good idea. So soon afterward, there I was: I’d quit my two jobs, my bags were packed, and I’d made the first payment on my tuition. My grandmother had sewn me two wool hats, Shannon had brought over clothes from my parents’ house, and Spencer was downstairs playing with Owen while he waited for me. I could hear them laughing from upstairs.
As I looked at myself in the mirror, Shannon sat on the bed behind me, asking, “So, are you nervous?”
I wondered… I don’t know if it was just me, butnothinglooked good on me that day. I was a disaster. My clothes sucked, my body sucked, my hair sucked. I took off what I was wearing and threw it into the pile on the floor. I had gone through what felt like a million outfits in record time.
My sister seemed to find the whole thing hilarious, and said, “Never mind, I don’t know why I even asked.”
“Why does everything look so terrible on me?”
“It’s just how you see yourself, hon, because you’re worried. I’m sorry, scratch that, it’s your clothes. It’s time to update your wardrobe. Thank God I picked you up a few things at the mall.”
“My clothing is fine,” I grunted.
“Jenny, you know I love you like no other and you’re the best sister in the world, but your fashion sense is, um…”
I rolled my eyes and kept looking, finally managing to find a red sweater I used to wear my first year of school. “How’s this one?” I asked.
“Obviously I like it, because it’s mine.”
“Itwasyours. It’s mine now.”
“Sure,” she replied. “If I can have your platform boots and your blue necklace.”
“Why don’t you just take everything else while you’re at it?” I asked. I was too tired to argue. The red sweater didn’t look terrible, at least. I’d end up keeping it, along with a few other garments I’d packed. My sister spent hours throwing clothes at me, and I’d either fold them or cast them aside. I doubted I’d make a splash back at school, but at least I wouldn’t have to go naked.
Neither Shannon nor I could get the suitcase to close, and I had to sit down on it as we each pulled one zipper, meeting in the middle. In themeanwhile, Shannon asked me to explain something to her: “It’s been a year since you’ve seen your old friends, right? Naya, Will, and Sue…with everything that happened with a certain young man I won’t name…aren’t you worried about running into him?”
“No,” I lied.
“But you’re sleeping in his room.”
