“It’s okay,” he said. “You were scared. You had every reason to be.”
I shook my head. “Still. You didn’t deserve the way I acted toward you.”
“You don’t owe me perfect trust,” he said. “You owe yourself safety. You chose that first. I get it.”
My chest tightened again, but this time it wasn’t fear taking over. It was relief.
“I trust you now,” I told him, needing him to know it. “I really do.”
His thumb brushed my cheek as a small, amused grin pulled at his lips. “Good. Because I’m not going anywhere.”
Callan
We lay on our sides facing the window, both of us watching the night sky without saying much. I held her close, my arm under her neck and my hand resting over her stomach. My thumb moved in small strokes without me thinking about it. When I glanced down, I watched her fingers playing with mine absentmindedly.
I felt her body settle a little more against me. Her breathing had evened out, and the tension in her shoulders eased. I knew she wasn’t fully calm yet, but she was getting there, and I wanted to keep giving her something steady to lean on.
When I looked back at the sky, I tried to take in everything at once. The dark, the scattered stars, and I wondered what was going through her mind. I wondered whether she wasletting herself drift away from the noise and fear from earlier, or if she was overthinking again. Maybe she was out there mapping the damn constellations with that sharp mind of hers, trying to name every star up there.
Then she shifted in my arms and turned around to face me. The movement pulled my attention away from the window. Her eyes met mine, and it was in that moment that it hit me all at once and without warning. I knew exactly what was happening to me, and I let myself fall for her without trying to fight it. Without trying to talk myself out of it. I fell, and it felt like the easiest thing I had ever done.
But instead of admitting to it with words, I reached up to cup her face and kissed her. I didn’t want to overwhelm her. Didn’t want her to worry about one more thing. I just wanted her here in my arms, feeling my presence and support. It wasn’t the time for complex feelings.
She kissed me back lazily, and I smiled against her lips, cherishing every second of it.
When I broke the kiss, she looked into my eyes and licked her lips. We could’ve stayed like that for days, without having to use words to say what we were thinking.
Minutes later, I heard her stomach growl. I immediately pushed myself up on my elbow, sliding my hand over her belly. “Hungry?”
She nodded slowly. “A little.”
“What do you want to eat?”
She studied me for a moment, thinking about it hard as if it were the most difficult decision. I tried to help her figure it out by listing a few places I knew she liked until I landed on Sobu’s.
“Sushi sounds perfect,” she told me with a soft smile. “Maybe ramen too.”
I nodded. “Let me get my phone so we can order.”
I got out of bed and headed downstairs to grab my phone. While I was down there, I grabbed a glass and filled it with water to take up to her room. When I was back, Lana was sitting on the bed with her back resting against the headboard. I handed her the glass and sat back down while opening the takeout app.
“Here,” I said, holding the phone in front of her. “Just go through it and put whatever you want in the basket.”
She hesitated at first, but after taking a few sips of her water, and me assuring her that she didn’t have to worry about the money I’d spend, she finally took my phone and scrolled through the menu.
I put her glass on the nightstand and watched while she picked a few things. When she was done, I chose more items before placing the order. “The food will be here in about thirty minutes,” I told her, putting my phone to the side.
“Thank you.”
“You’re most welcome,” I said with a grin, pulling her into my arms. I pressed a kiss to her cheek and hugged her tight, then whispered, “Stop thanking me. Everything I do for you is because I want to.”
She studied me for a moment, her smile tight. “I’m not used to that.”
“I know. But you’ll get used to it.” It was a promise I wanted her to take seriously.
Her eyes searched my face for any sign that I was lying, and when she didn’t find one, her shoulders loosened and she settled against me again. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her fully into my chest. Months ago, she wouldn’t have allowed this. She kept her guard up, kept her distance, kept me in the same category as every man who used women. She assumed I would prove her right sooner or later, that I would show the same selfishness.
But I didn’t.
