He tipped is head back and released a deep breath.
“There was an incident on the job about four months ago,” he said. “It was…bad. Bad enough that I’ve been thinking long and hard about the path my career is headed.”
When he didn’t elaborate further, Leah asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”
The barest hint of a smile stole across his handsome face. “Is that nosiness rearing its head again?”
“This isn’t me being nosy. It’s me being concerned. I can understand if you don’t want to get into it right now, but if it’s something you need to talk about just know that I’m here.”
“Believe it or not, it’s what this entire weekend was originally supposed to be about.”
Leah frowned. “I thought this weekend was about a fishing trip with your buddies?”
“That was my cover,” he said.
Her body stilled as her adrenaline spiked. “Wait a minute. Are you undercover this weekend?”
That fetched a genuine laugh from him. “No, that’s not what I meant,” Caleb said.
He shifted on the bench, stretching his legs out and then settling back so that she could resume the spot she’d occupied for the past half hour, resting against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and continued his fingers’ gentle glide along her bare arm.
“This weekend wasn’t just a regular fishing trip with the guys,” Caleb started. “They didn’t know that, but I’d made the decision that this weekend would be the one where I decided whether or not to continue with the DCJ or move on.”
“Do you no longer like working there?”
“I’ll be honest, it’s a tough job. Having to see the worse in humanity day in and day out starts to take its toll, especially in my division.”
“What division do you work in?”
“Human trafficking.”
Leah’s stomach immediately dropped. She couldn’t imagine the atrocities he’d witnessed on the job. She didn’t want to.
“I’ve seen things that keep me up at night,” Caleb said, as if reading her mind, yet deciding to tell her anyway. “You think doing a couple of tours in Iraq was hard? What I saw in the Middle East is nothing compared to the stuff I’ve seen up and down the Jersey Turnpike.” His chest rose with the huge breath he sucked in. “I’ve encountered some horrible shit on the job, but about four months ago there was an incident that changed everything.”
Seconds ticked by without either of them saying a word. Leah started to prompt him, but stopped. She wouldn’t push. Her heart already ached over whatever it was that had him questioning leaving a job she could tell meant so much to him.
After a solid two minutes passed, Caleb finally began again.
“About a year ago, a low-level drug dealer was arrested over in Union County. My division had been working with the DEA because where there’s trafficking, there’s also drugs. One of the dealers—a piece of shit named Tommy McCain—managed to get his case thrown out on a technicality.” He paused for a moment. “The most damning evidence against him was found in his car, but the search warrant my partner and I had was valid only for his apartment, so all that evidence we found in his car was thrown out.
“About four months ago, several runaways were found in an old beat-up house in Bergen County. Turns out it was McCain who took them. He held them there for over a week, drugged them, and forced them to have sex with as many as twenty men a day. The oldest girl was fifteen. The other two were thirteen.”
Leah gasped. “Oh, my God, Caleb.”
“Can you imagine the nightmare those girls went through? Children.” Disgust imbued his voice. “It keeps me awake at night, Leah. If not for my mistake, McCain wouldn’t have been back out on the streets. Those girls never would have had to go through that.”
“But you can’t say that with certainty,” Leah pointed out. She turned so she could look him in the eye. “You do realize that those girls could have easily gotten caught up with someone else, don’t you?”
“But they didn’t. It was McCain. The guy who was free to roam the streets because I didn’t take the time to read over a damn warrant.”
The pain that slashed across his face tore at Leah’s chest. The grief he’d suffered over this was more than evident. It also made clear just how seriously he took his job. This wasn’t just a paycheck for him. He cared. He cared deeply.
“So, what happened?” She asked. “Was this McCain guy arrested?”
Caleb nodded. “But the damage had already been done. Those three girls will never be the same. Their lives are ruined.”
“Oh, Caleb, you can’t blame yourself for that.”
