My eyes flick from my instruments to the skyline, and with my heart clamoring to beat its way out of my chest, I turn the plane, staying in pattern to return to the airport.
I keep all of my cursing and reassurances to myself, and I’m proud that I sound like an actual pilot when I broadcast my plans to land on the common frequency.
“Here we go,” I mutter, lining up the nose of the Cessna with the runway while making sure I come in at the proper angle and height. “Stay steady. Be a good girl.”
Talking to the plane like George did gives me an odd boost of confidence.
You’ve got this.
And the moment before the wheels touch down, I finally believe that I do.
The landing isn’t the smoothest. I bounce more than once, the yoke shudders in my hands, and I say “Hell” a few dozen times.
But then I roll forward, on the ground, safe and sound.
“I did it,” I whisper. Then I push my microphone away from my mouth and scream it. “I DID IT!”
I want to cry. I want to dance. But most of all, I want to tell everyone I love that I freakingflew a planeall by myself.
Instead, I put a pause on celebrating and taxi back to the runway to go again. Two more successful landings and I’ve proven without a doubt that I can fly a plane on my own. I carefully guide the Cessna toward the tie-down spot where I meet up with a grinning Aden. After I shut down the engine and pull off the headset, I return his thumbs-up through the window. When I push open the door, he gives me a round of applause.
“Amazing, Beth. You did great.”
“Thank you. For the advice and for fitting me into your schedule.” When I contacted Aden about acting as my flight instructor, he was surprised but didn’t hesitate to say yes.
When we went up together for my practice passes, I admit it felt odd to have someone other than George guiding me. But Aden was great. Professional and helpful. Ready with advice and also with praise. He has a more enthusiastic approach than I’m used to. I didn’t mind it, but if I had to choose, I’d opt for George’s stoic manner.
Still, flying with Aden was a test in a different way. I realized when we were about to take off that it was my first flight without George. Without the man I knew could take over and land us if we had an emergency.
Theoretically, Aden has the same capability. But George has proven himself in that arena.
Even though I missed the familiar presence at my side, I think it was good to fly with someone else before going up by myself. I needed the reassurance that I could fly a plane without George as a safety blanket. Like a final step toward making sure the aftermath of our emergency landing didn’t have lasting negative effects.
Doesn’t change the fact that I wish he was here. That George is the one I wanted to share this success with.
“I’m going out of town next week,” Aden says conversationally as we work through the steps to tie down the airplane. “We can check in when I get back about the next time you want to go up. Maybe map out a route to another airport if you’re feeling ready to go solo for a distance.”
“Really?” My voice quivers with a mixture of nerves and excitement.
Aden circles around to check my knots and gives me a nod of approval. “You’re a natural. And Bunsen taught you well.”
“Thanks.” The deep voice has me whirling around to find the speaker.
George stands not far off. Looks like he came out of the hangar door.
“I didn’t know you were flying today.” My greeting leaves much to be desired.
From the firm line of his mouth, George seems to agree.
In the days since I stormed out of his apartment, we’ve exchanged only a handful of texts. Mainly good morning and good night messages. Not because I don’t want to talk to him. More because I still don’t know what to say.
Especially if he asks about who has made me insecure about not paying for flight time.
He takes another step toward me, then pauses and tucks his hands in his pockets. As if maybe he needs to restrain them to keep from reaching for me. And I hate that I’ve made him feel that way. That he needs to tuck away all signs of affection.
This man, who’s lived his life with so little from the people who were supposed to shower it on him.
As I try to figure out the best way to fix whatever I’ve fractured, Aden unknowingly comes to my aid.
