Unfortunately, the breaking of the glass set off a loud and irritating alarm, blaring away while Snod
cursed furiously.
“I thought you turned off the fucking alarm!” Rees shouted over the noise.
“I turned it off for the doors! Not for the windows! Those are hooked into the display cases, and
they’re on a separate circuit!”
“Well, why didn’t you turn those off? Some big robbery expert, huh!”
“Shut up and move!” Snod quickly picked up the desk and hurried through the broken window, kicking
glass out of his way. He loaded the desk into the back of the truck, scrambling to jump into the
passenger seat. “Fucking drive!”
Rees crawled into the driver’s seat, cranking the truck up. As if their night couldn’t be any more
horrible, the annoying happy music began to play over the speakers again. Rees kept slapping at
buttons on the dashboard, frantic as he shouted, “Fuck, fuck, fuck! I can’t turn it off!”
“Just fucking go!” Snod hollered desperately, certain that the police had to be on their way and would
be arriving any second. “Why did you turn the damn van off? I told you to keep it running—”
“I didn’t want anyone snatching it while we were inside!”
“No one in their right mind would steal this wretched abomination! Now for the love of God,fucking
drive!”
“Fuck off!” Rees punched the gas and off they went, Snod nearly flying into the floorboards since he
had no seatbelt to hold him in place. They scooted through the streets of downtown Philadelphia, that
annoying musical tune wrecking any possibility of stealth.
Frantically pounding at every button on the dash, Snod sighed in relief when the music finally
stopped. He slumped against the seat, quickly checking their mirrors and all around them. He didn’t
hear any sirens nor did he see any flashing lights.
Even as they left the city, no one seemed to be in pursuit of them.
Rees broke the tense silence, laughing triumphantly as he cheered, “Holy fuck, that was kind of fun!
Anything else you wanna steal, darling?”
“Not with you,” Snod replied, but soon he was laughing too. “That was the most unprofessional,
disastrous robbery I have ever been a part of.”
“Yeah, but it was fucking fun!” Rees exclaimed, grinning wide. “Oof, gimme my trail mix. I can feel
my sugar getting low. I need something to eat.”
