“Fire away,” I borrow his words.
“Chad. You know you could have always done better than him. Right? Why didn’t you?”
I practically opened myself for that sort of question. “Maybe I didn’t know that Icoulddo better.”
“So, you agree?”
I smirk. “I agree. But I wouldn’t have thought so at the time.” I pause for a breath to reflect on how I was all those years ago.I guess I was little more than a robot. “We’d always known each other, and it felt like we were just supposed to be together. I’d never been with anyone else until we broke up.”
“Would you have married him had you not broken up?”
There’s that question again. “I don’t know. Sometimes I think the answer is no, but I’m biased because of everything that’s happened. At other times, I think I would have because I didn’t know any different.”
It’s strange talking to Knox so openly about Chad. Stranger that he’s allowing me to. Then again, he was the one who asked the question.
“Do you still love him?”
“Not as a boyfriend. Just as an old friend.” I glance up at him, realizing he’s trying to see through me. Maybe checking if I’m lying. “Thanks for not rubbing our breakup in my face.”
“You don’t have to thank me for that. What he did was low down dirty. But it doesn’t surprise me.”
I give him a thin stare. “Are you saying that because you don’t like him?”
“Yes and no.” His boots grind against the pebbles on the path, like he’s stomping on Chad. “Guys like him don’t appreciate good things when they have them. They wait until they lose it, then they try to save it. But it’s always too late, and you can never guarantee that they won’t do the same things again. You can’t trust someone like that.”
Well said. “I agree. He thinks I’m just being difficult and that it’s as simple as forgiveness. It’s not.”
“I know, love. I know.” He sounds like he really does know the inner workings of my emotions. Maybe he does.
“How do you know?”
“I told you. You grew up. You became a woman and left theboybehind. That’s why he’s been friend-zoned.”
“I think you’re right. Friends is all we’ll ever be. Maybe not even that one day. It’s sad, I suppose. He was one of the first people to support my artwork.”
“He was good for something, then.”
I roll my eyes at him. “He wasn’t all bad.”
“Please don’t tell me he encouraged you to work in that rundown theatre. By the way, I noticed you’re still on the books even though I told you to quit.”
“Chad didn’t encourage me to work there.” I frown, cutting him a hard stare. “And I can’t just quit. It’s good to keep something going for my resume, so I’ll stay until I find something else. I also like working.”
“I understand the resume part, but not the working in a dump part. I gave you a card with a hundred grand spending limit, and you haven’t spent a cent.” He tugs on the inside of his lip and tightens his grip on my hand.
“I don’t plan to spend any of that money.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s yours and… it doesn’t feel right.”
He cocks his head, giving me a once-over. “What’s mine is yours, love.”
I’m in awe at his words, but spending his money will never sit right with me. “That still doesn’t make it right.”
“Because of your father?” He holds my gaze.
“Yes.” I blow out a ragged breath.
