A tic of strain pops in his jaw. “Because I say so.”
“Doesn’t it matter what I want?”
“Has it ever?”
The answer is no. A loud, resounding boom meant to deter. But I don’t hear it. I’ve been waiting all of my teenage years for this moment. I’m not letting it slip away.
“Just once. No one has to know.”
His eyes flash with a streak of lightning. “How fucking nice. I can be your shameful secret. No fucking thanks. Find someone else to slum it with.”
I almost smack my forehead. How could I be so dense? “That’s not what I meant, Gray.” This is not going according to plan. I lick my lips and search for a different route. “I wantyou, and always have. I’ve saved myself foryou. My first time is meant to be withyou.”
Grady flops onto his bed with a groan. “People accuse me of doing a lot of bad shit, but I’ve never been a thief. I’m not stealing your fucking cherry, Sutton.”
I’m shaking my head before he’s done talking. Heat crawls up my chest and neck, but I’m already buried too far. “But I want to do this with you. It has to be you.”
He scrubs a palm over his face. “Don’t do this desperate act. Give yourself to a man who’s deserving.”
“I’m looking at him.” This wall between us needs to crumble. I step out of my soggy flip-flops and instantly feel more at home. If I reach forward, my hand will skim his blankets. It’s been years since I’ve felt the comfort—albeit platonic—of his arms. I curl my toes into the carpet at being this close again.
Grady glares at the ceiling. “Seriously. I shouldn’t have to repeat myself, but I will. Go home, Sutt.”
“Please, Gray.” The two words trickle off my trembling lips.
His scoff echoes around the dark room. “Begging is far beneath you, Sutt. Keep that silver spoon in your mouth.”
That has me clacking my teeth together. “Don’t be an asshole.”
“Then don’t force my hand. Go back to your side of the fence. You don’t belong in these bunks.”
Something dark flips inside of me. “This is my property. I have every right to be here.”
He grunts into a clenched fist. “Don’t need another reminder of who reigns.”
The strength that brought me here is beginning to crack under his pressure. But a lingering spark ignites when I catch him staring at me. Grady rarely looks my way for longer than a casual glance. But the privacy of his bedroom is proving to make a difference. He doesn’t conceal the way his eyes skitter across my exposed skin. There’s unmasked hunger waiting for me there. That gives me a much needed confidence boost.
It’s not an accident that I’m wearing a daringly low-cut shirt. The hem of my skirt is a few inches too short. Am I acting desperate like he claims? No doubt. Do I care about being the one pursuing this? Not in the slightest. Am I worried about being rejected? More than I care to admit. But that fear doesn’t hinder me.
“Did you know that I’m leaving tomorrow?” I catch a brief glimmer of shock register across Grady’s features. A twitch snags his eyebrow. His throat bobs with a heavy swallow. He rolls his gaze off mine, avoiding the truth. If I hadn’t been standing so close, watching his every move, the reaction would be missed.
“And your point?” It appears he’s choosing to address the wall.
“I’ll be gone. We won’t see each other anymore.” I hold my breath while waiting for more honesty to show.
Grady’s lips tighten. “So, you came for a farewell fuck?”
I wrinkle my nose. “Must you be so crass?”
“Don’t act like this is a new development.” His tone is flat and stiff.
I rub my temples. I’m beginning to see the massive error in my ways. But my heart is stubborn. “I always wanted things to be different between us.”
“Sorry to disappoint.” His tone reveals he’s anything but.
I’m already waist deep. Why not wade a bit further? “It’s not too late, Gray. I’m here now. This is what I’ve been waiting for.”
“Wait longer. You’re still a fucking kid, Sutt.”
