I understand what he’s doing, but I don’t think it will work. Neither of them knows about Dee’s condition, and they’re women. They’re clucky, and anything babies make them happy.I turn to Johnny, and he exhales as Anna waves her hand at him dismissively.
“Johnny, don’t be silly. Talking about your baby is taking my mind off the pain. It’s nice to have something happy to talk about, something exciting for all of us. You’re gonna be a dad, Johnny, and I’m going to be an auntie. That’s majorly exciting, and I can’t wait to meet the little guy. Can’t you?” Dee gushes.
I swallow hard. It’s obvious how happy talking about babies is making her. How can I possibly tell her that the excitement she’s feeling for Anna, she willneverexperience for herself?
“Yeah, I’m excited, Dee. But I don’t think we need to be bothering you with it all right now. You need to concentrate on yourself and get better, not us,” Johnny explains, causing the girls to smile.
“That’s so nice, Johnny, but you guys are like family to me. Yes, I might need to concentrate on myself for a while, but it doesn’t mean I can’t celebrate the awesomeness that’s happening to Anna and you right now. Trust me, it’s no bother at all.”
I exhale loudly in frustration, gaining everyone’s attention.
Dee furrows her brows in confusion as I fake a smile, trying to cover up my sigh.
“You okay, babe?” Dee asks.
Obviously, I didn’t cover it up well enough.
I was never any good at poker.
“Yeah, baby, just tired, is all,” I reply, and Anna half-smiles.
“Right, well, I think maybe it is time for Johnny and me to go. The last thing I want is for Colt to start passing out again. I’m glad you’re feeling better, Dee, and we will visit tomorrow. Look after my girl, Colt.” Anna smiles, stands from Dee’s bed, and walks over to Johnny. He wraps his arm around her waist, pulling her to his side.
“Have a good night, you two,” Anna announces as she and Johnny walk toward the doorway.
“Anna?”
“Yeah, Dee?”
“Thank you for your reassurance and support. It means a lot that even this far into your pregnancy, you came out to see me,” Dee confides, and I walk over to her bed, sitting on the edge.
Dee takes my hand, and I hold on to hers tightly, hoping she doesn’t notice that mine is trembling with nerves.
“Anytime, and next time I visit you in the hospital, it’ll be because you and Colt will be having a baby. You got it?” Anna says, and Dee smiles brightly.
This is absolutely tearing me apart.
Fuck! How am I supposed to tell her, and snuff that light out?
“You betcha. I can’t wait to be as fat as you are now.” Dee laughs, and I look at Johnny through a watery haze threatening to flood over the walls of my eyelids. He quickly takes Anna, and they walk out as Anna laughs.
Dee’s thumb gently caresses the back of my hand as I continue to stare out the doorway, avoiding the questioning gaze I know she will have when she sees my eyes. If our eyes meet and I see how happy she is at the thought of being pregnant, I will seriously lose it.
“Hey, you look a million miles away. You all right?” she asks as she moves slightly on the bed, making herself more comfortable.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired,” I lie.
“Did you and Johnny have a fight or something? He really wanted to leave,” she asks, and I decide my best course is to continue lying to her.
“Not a fight as such, maybe just a disagreement on where the band is heading,” I say, and somehow, I find the courage to turn and look her in the eyes.
Those beautiful green eyes are so alive and vibrant.
Those eyes that, when I tell her, will be endless pools of despair.
“Well, don’t cancel everything just for me. I’m fine. Yeah, my leg’s a little broken, but it’s healing, and we can fly back to London soon. You and the guys can continue recording and everything you were doing before the accident. I don’t want your career to stop just because I had a little accident, Colt,” she says, making me smile.
This woman is always so selfless.
