I don’t know what I’m even doing here.
Why did I come?
What the hell was I thinking?
I push up from the bed, but my legs barely hold me. I stumble, colliding with the wall, my palms flattening against it as I squeeze my eyes shut.
For fuck’s sake.
Why did I think this was a good idea?
I can’t think. Can’t breathe.
All I can see ishim.
Colt.
His face twisted in pain. His voice, raw and broken, telling me tofuck off.
There’s a warm hand on my shoulder, steadying me. I blink up through tear-soaked lashes, my vision blurred, my breath stuttering out in gasps. “H-he doesn’t w-want me, Anna.” My voice cracks, the words barely making it out through the sobs.
Colt suddenly stands and looks at me in a way he never has before, and I have no idea what it means. “I want you, Dee,” he says, then rushes toward me, taking me in his arms and flinging me to the bed. His hands grab my wrists, and he holds them above my head as I look into his eyes.
“I can feel you. Ineedto feel you,” Colt says while Johnny and Anna stand back.
“Colt, I’m here. I’m right here.”
His eyes are slits, and his nostrils are flaring. “No, you’re not. You’re a damn figment of my imagination, and you’re hurting me, so I’m going to hurt you,” he says, holding onto my wrists so tightly it’s painful.
“Colt, you’re hurting me.” And now I fear I’m looking into the eyes of a madman.
“That’s the idea,” he says, glaring at me with his face scrunched up in anger.
I close my eyes.
The Colt I love is nowhere to be seen.
And this version of Colt?Well, I want nothing to do with him.
Suddenly, he’s pulled from me, but his hands don’t let go of my wrists, and I yelp as I’m dragged up with him.
“Colt, let her go.Now,” Johnny yells as he tries to pull Colt’s hands away from my wrists. I struggle to help Johnny free Colt’s hands while he stares at me, baring his teeth.
“Colt, it’s me, Dee. I’m here with you. Pleasestop. You’re hurting me,” I beg.
Anna stands back with her hand covering her mouth.
I continue to struggle before Johnny finally frees my wrists from Colt’s grip. My wrists are red and throbbing from where Colt had such a tight grip. He pushes Johnny and escapes to the living room.
Anna’s by my side in an instant, and Johnny takes off after Colt.
I burst into hysterical crying and collapse on the bed.
“Oh, Dee, I’m so sorry. I had no idea he’d react that way. He’s seriously off his head. It’s not him talking… it’s the drugs. You know that,right?”she asks, wrapping her arms around me. I hear yelling from the other room, but I don’t listen. I’m in too much pain—physically and emotionally—to even think about what’s happening out there.
Then comes the anger.
A tidal wave of fiery red-hot adrenaline surges through me that brings me to my feet. So I walk out to where Johnny and Colt are arguing.
