“Colt, you’renotdreaming. Dee is here. Open your damn eyes. She’s right next to you,” Anna replies.
I reach my hand out to touch his face.
He leans into my hand and inhales sharply. “No!Go away, Anna. I can feel her. I can smell her. She’s right here with me, and I’mneverletting her go,” he says, pulling me to him.
I can’t hold back the tears that fall, yet he still hasn’t opened his damn eyes.
“Colt, I’m right here,” I softly say.
His eyes shoot wide open.
He looks at me—his chest heaving.
His hands are all over me.
“Anna… Anna… I feel her. What the hell is wrong with me?” He sits up on the bed, and I sit up as well. He’s looking at me, but he seems confused.
I furrow my brow.
What’s wrong with him?
“Colt, she isreallyhere,” Anna says.
“No, she can’t be. She left me. She left me, Anna. She’snotreal. She can’t be. Anna, what’s happening to me?” he rambles, backing away from me to the other side of the bed.
My bottom lip quivers.
My heart feels like it’s being ripped from my chest.
I shake my head and reach out for him, but he backs further away.
“Anna, I can see her. Am I going crazy? I’m going fucking crazy! I’ve never seen her before, not with my eyes open. Anna, help me. Make it stop. Make her go away. I can’t stand it,” he rambles, backing up so much that he falls off the bed and then scurries back against the wall, clawing at his eyes.
My hand shoots to my mouth in shock, my heart pounding ferociously in my chest.
Johnny rushes over and holds his hands. “Colt! Stop! You’re not going crazy. Dee’sreallyhere. It’sher. She’s here to help you,” Johnny talks calmly, but Colt still has that terrified, wide-eyed stare.
“It’s a lie. Don’t lie to me, Johnny. She’sneverhere. She’snothere. I’m going crazy. Kill me, Johnny, just kill me. I can’t stand it anymore.” Colt’s struggling on the floor against Johnny. That’s when Anna walks over and slaps Colt hard across the face, his neck twisting so far with the force of the slap.
He stops fighting and rests his head against the wall, his eyes shut. “I cansmell her,” he yells.
I’ve never seen someone as troubled as he is right now. He thinks he’s imagining me, that he’s going crazy.
God, this is hard to watch.
Johnny wraps his arm around Colt, and he leans into Johnny’s chest.
“Stop it! Just… fuck off!” Colt’s voice is hoarse, thick with agony. “Fuck off, Dee! You’re not real. You’reneverfucking real.” His body shakes, violent tremors wracking through him as he curls in on himself. “I can’t do this. I can’t stand it.” His breath hitches, the words breaking apart between sobs.
He turns blindly toward Johnny, his hands fisting his hair like he’s drowning, like he’s reaching for an anchor. “Johnny, make her go away.” His voice shatters. “Please. Just… just make her go away.”
Well, shit.
He doesn’t want me.
The words lodge in my chest like a blade, twisting, cutting deeper with every second.
I feel dizzy. Unsteady. My head spins, thoughts colliding into each other, messy and panicked.
