My days blur into hours spent with Anna, filling the void. And my nights? They end the same way, with me, curled up in bed, crying myself to sleep.
Something has to give.
Today, Anna and I are getting drunk over a bottle of champagne and crying about how miserable we both are.
At least I’m not alone.
At least I don’t feel like I’m being unreasonable.
“I can’t even remember the last time Colt and I made love. He’s too tired when he climbs into bed, and I never see him otherwise. I feel like we’ve drifted apart, and I’m not sure if we can find our way back to each other. The band’s his priority, and I get that, but I’d like to have one day to ourselves. I don’t know… maybe this is just how it’s meant to be,” I say, taking another sip of my champagne.
Anna looks at me and frowns. “When’s the last time you guys slept together?”
I look up, trying to think when the last time was. “The first week of the second leg. In the second week, Colt was coming to bed too late, and now I hardly even wake when he does finally come in,” I say, exhaling and dropping my chin to my chest.
“Wow,” she says.
“Why, wow?”
“Well, it’s just that Colt is such a sexual being. To think he’s gone nearly two months without sex is…strange.”
My heart begins to pound hard in my chest.
“What are you saying?”
“No, no, nothing. I’m not saying he’s cheating on you. There’s no way he would. I’m just saying that hemustbe tired if he’s not searching for any kind of physical connection between the two of you.”
Goddammit!Instantly, I tense and then begin to break down. I feel like I am shaking as tears flow like a river down my cheeks,and Anna wraps her arm around me. “Hey, I know how fucking shit this is. Trust me, I know. But you can’t give up on him. Not yet, okay?” She hands me a tissue. “Okay, I’m gonna text Johnny and tell him to stay in the suite tonight with Colt. You’re staying here with me, and we can wallow together. Give them their time without us and see how they like it,” Anna says.
I lower my chin, drawing in a shuddering breath. She pulls out her phone, typing a quick text as I wipe my eyes and nose with the tissue.
“Okay, done! Now, I’m getting more champagne. We’re locking the door, no one’s crashing our room, and we’re getting even drunker than we already are. Got it?” Anna announces, bouncing up from the bed and making a beeline for the fridge.
I stay put in Johnny and Anna’s bedroom, peeling off my jeans before sliding under the covers, my back resting against the headboard. Moments later, Anna bursts back in, two more bottles of champagne in hand. She kicks the door shut, flicks the lock, and grins like we’re about to commit a crime.
I chuckle at her energy as she hops onto the other side of the bed, popping a cork and filling our glasses.
“Here’s to absent husbands and missing boyfriends,” she toasts, raising her glass.
Sniffling, I clink mine against hers, and together, we down our drinks in one go.
It’s going to be a long night.
***
Someone is playing with the door handle, and I stir awake.
My head’s pounding, and a wave of nausea hits as I hear Colt and Johnny mumbling, “Why is the door locked?” My mouth fills with saliva, and I know I’m going to be sick. Stumbling out of bed, I rush to the ensuite and make it just in time. I heaveheavily and can’t stop the sounds escaping my mouth as the champagne makes a reappearance.
A loud thud echoes through the room—Is that someone banging on the door?—but I barely register it. My gut twists violently as another wave of nausea hits, keeping me hunched over the toilet.
Then, a crash.
Through my endless heaving, I vaguely hear my name being called, distant yet urgent. The ensuite light flickers on, and even in my miserable state, my body reacts. A familiar current of electricity surges through me as a warm hand caresses my back, steadying me.
“Jesus, baby,” he says as he pulls my hair back from my face.
“Is she okay, Colt?” I hear Johnny ask as another round of relentless heaving starts.
