Scrubbing his hands over his face, Ryder explained in a thick voice, “I saw–I mean Irememberedhow I died.It was–”
“Roan.Me.Yes, of course,” Caemorn guessed.
Ryder looked up at the Kaly Vampire.Caemorn rarely allowed any of his emotions to show on his face or in his body movements, but there was a tightness to his jaw that told Ryder he was ashamed of this.Considering Roan–or parts of him–were still out there and not absorbed by Caemorn, Ryder wondered how he knew what had happened between him and Roan.Or was it just a logical conclusion?Or did he have some faint memories of Roan’s?
“Legion and Roan teamed up.Roan promised to make me Legion’s.I don’t know how…” Ryder swallowed.
“You do not wish to know,” Caemorn confirmed softly.“I can imagine what I allowed Legion to do to you.What could be done is vast and… painful.”
“Must have got away though since I’m here,” Ryder pointed out with a wry smile, which quickly died.
Caemorn inclined his head in agreement.Why did it feel like a pyrrhic victory?No, to not be in Legion and Roan’s hands, to be here with Grayson and his friends and his pack… these things were priceless.
“Legion’s a monster, Caemorn.I don’t just mean physically–though definitely physically–but mentally and emotionally,” Ryder got out as he scrubbed his mouth.“I don’t know what they were before I turned them, but it couldn’t have been good and then the War let them–no,Ilet them–indulge in their vices until there wasn’t anything decent left in them.”
Caemorn said nothing.It wasn’t a judgment against him, but just an acknowledgment that he trusted Ryder to give an honest assessment of Legion and his own actions. Caemorn never veered away from taking the blame for his past.He obviously expected Ryder to be just as honest and unflinching, which was flattering.But wasn’t part of the reason that he didn’t want to remember what he’d done was fear of the shame he’d feel?Weryn did feel shame.His memory had confirmed that at least.
There really isn’t much difference between me as I was then and now except Ashyr’s loss.I might not be different, but the relationships around me and the other Immortals are.We would not turn on one another like we did back then.
Ryder shook himself, the cobwebs of that memory still sticking to him and making him slow.Remembering what had happened in the past was one thing, but what did it tell him about this moment?He felt as if Weryn were trying to warn him.Caemorn was right that there was a trap set, not just for Grayson, but for him, too.All of them maybe.He just had to figure out what it was.
Grayson, gods, are you all right?Balthazar?Ryder called.
We’re handling things!Balthazar had that mixture of puckish amusement mixed with hysteria that often meant things were going according to plan–sort of–but everything was on a knife’s edge.
That was not comforting.
Is Grayson–
Focus on whatever it is you think Roan and Legion are up to, Ryder,Balthazar suggested–though it sounded suspiciously like a command–before adding,You knew them both.I didn’t catch all of your memory, but you have a deeper understanding of Legion than you thought.That will allow us to anticipate what their next move is.We have things in hand here.
Ryder swallowed.He wanted to demand the right to go to Grayson.But he was the one keeping himself here.Borage had long ago been lowered.Not that the enchanted spear could have kept him there.He knew that he had to think.Had to understand.Then something occurred to him.There wasoneway he knew that the Sect could be getting into and out of Nightvallen without them knowing.Daemon’s body no longer lay there, but it was a place avoided by all.Especially by Daemon.
“I think I know how they’ve been getting into the city without us knowing, without Daemon even knowing,” Ryder said with his brow bunched.“Though he must simply be avoiding that spot, even with his abilities for him not to sense them–”
“The catacombs,” Caemorn stated simply.Seeing Ryder’s raised eyebrows, he added, “I was not holding out on you.I did not consider them until you mentioned Daemon avoiding that area.You see, the catacombs have been bothering me since we returned here.”
“It’s a vast unguarded area so yes, they’re botheringme, too,” Ryder pointed out.“Weryn have always guarded Nightvallen.It would have been good to have known about them and your concerns.”
Caemon nodded.Clearly, he was filing that note somewhere.He wouldn’t make the same mistake twice.But like all things, Ryder realized, Caemorn was still learning to count others in on his plans.
And there were other issues too as Caemorn said, “It’s so hard to know how much assistance Daemon needs in guarding this place.”
Ryder knew exactly what he meant.“We starved him for who knows how long.He’s fed plenty, but he’s still recovering though he may not want to admit it.”
Another nod.“He can’t very well admit to any weakness right now.Not even to us.”
“He wants us to be vigilant, but not overly anxious.”Ryder rubbed his face again.“And then there’s what you said about Seeyr.Getting Daemon back was only part of her plan.This must be, too.I don’t see her patrolling the grounds anxiously or dropping hints.”
“I do believe she has planned things.But I also am concerned that I might have damaged her,” Caemorn answered simply and looked away.“She, too, was starved.Her eyes should have returned long ago if she were fully healed.But they have not.So, like Daemon, they are both operating at perhaps less than optimal.”
Caemorn’s gaze was on Tarn and Farun then who were scratching themselves.Was he thinking about how he had harmed them?Made them into beasts and not men?If that was in fact what had happened.
Caemorn spoke again, “I intended to look for entrances to the catacombs, but my time has been…” Here he pressed his lips together in a tight line.“But I have been enjoying myself.With Balthazar, Christian and Julian.The academy as well, but, in truth, my occupations have been pleasurable and not work or duty.”
Kaly enjoying himself with others.Kaly finding comfort in friendship and closeness.Kaly loving people and being loved back.Caemorn clearly was thriving under these conditions, but it tooktimeto be on top of everything.Something had to be put aside to make room for love and life.
And it was so easy to sit and have a second glass of blood-wine when Balthazar started on another funny story instead of scurrying underground.Or put off looking for likely empty catacombs when Christian needed help learning something in his role as Speaker to the Dead.And who wouldn’t want to spend time with Julian as the Vampire Prince gave Caemorn his full and total attention?There were so many more pleasurable things to do than to check places that had been empty for millennia and were directly under Daemon’s eyes.
