Brandon tries to steady me, tries to take Malinara from me, but I don’t give her up.
“So, that’s it? You’re going back to living like a dirty secret, waiting for him to leave his wife–”
How dare he throw that in my face! Something snaps in me, and I can barely hold back from shouting. “You’re one to talk!”
Not even the ninth circle of hell is hotter than my anger right now.
“What?” Brandon has the nerve to look surprised.
So, I let him have it. “Howdareyou judge me? Going to live the high life with the best orchestra in the world but keeping them waiting for an answer while you decide which woman you want to take with you.”
“What’s the hell are you talking about?” And I swear he looks like I’ve hit a nerve.
“I can’t believe you’re the same person I’ve known for eight months. I can’t believe...” My last control breaks and everything spews out, the good, the bad and the ugly.
“All that talk about your wish list, about needing to stay here. Was that just to make them want you more? Make yourself seem harder to get? And now they’ve got you, off you go without a second thought.”
“Stop, Lessa, Stop.” He snaps back, his face red.
Malinara starts to cry, but I can’t stop. Because he hasn’t denied it. He hasn’t said, ‘What women? No one has got me.’
“My God,” I continue in a lower voice but somehow more hostile. Where did all this anger come from? “I believed you. But you are as sincere as a political manifesto at election time. Pretty lies which you’ll drop without thinking about–”
“Don’t compare me–” he shouts.
“Without thinking about your brother, or have you forgotten him?” I interrupt him. “Weren’t you supposed to live here for a year?” I want to bring up the promise of celibacy but don’t dare in case my fears are confirmed, so instead I ask. “If a deathbed request doesn’t matter, what does? Or is Liam less important now you’ve found real success?”
Brandon’s head snaps back as if I’d slapped him. Which, in a way, I have.
This is so below the belt; I hate myself for saying it. Too late, I manage to stop talking.
There is silence, the kind that is loud with the echo of awful words. It’s me who is the politician, going on the attack to hide my jealousy, my hurt and anger. And he was supposed to be my best friend?Was. Poor Liam’s wishes are coming undone and dropping off like dead leaves.
Malinara’s crying turns to screams, picking up on our emotions on top of the shouting. I gather her to my broken heart and go upstairs.
Chapter Forty-one
Brandon
That could have gone better.
So much for trying to help her, to save her from pain.
It only took a visit from that bloody minister to turn me into a caveman. Not that I’d have minded showing him my inner neanderthal, but it was Lessa who got to see it.
I stand in the middle of the kitchen breathing hard, trying to get my thoughts back in order.
Lessa.
Earlier I’d been hoping to be more than best friends. Now, I’d be lucky to salvage even a minimal friendship.
The floor is sticky with spilt drink and shattered glass just like the ruin of my mood. It takes me ten minutes to clean it all up while my anger slowly recedes.
Pouring myself another drink, I try to wait. We both need time to calm down.
An hour later, and Lessa still hasn’t come back down. I go upstairs to look for her.
She’s sitting by the crib, where I sat earlier, watching a sleeping Malinara. Her body trembles slightly when I place a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes are red rimmed.
