Max doesn’t rush me. He waits until I sit up and reach for the gag again. My hands are steady this time.
“There are two straps on here,” Max says as he takes it from me. “I’m just going to clip the one on in the back, so if it gets to be too much, you can take it off yourself, all right?”
It’s a sweet gesture, meant to give me an extra feeling of security. If Max were to ignore my tapping on his knee, I could stop it myself.
Max is careful as he straps the gag around the back of my head, and I take a deep breath, reminding myself of everything he said. Reminding myself of how gentle he was with me just now on the bed. He didn’t have to do any of that for me.
Still, as soon as he slides into my mouth, my body wants to pull back. This is different from when I sucked him off in his office. There, I could stop whenever I wanted. But now, he could hurt me if he wanted to.
I try to push the thought to the back of my mind and focus on him. With the gag in place, I can’t close my lips around his dick, so it’s more about him holding my head in place while he thrusts into my mouth.
Something about the feeling of being used, of having to please Max, turns me on. I don’t hate looking up at him, watching his body work as he thrusts in and out of my mouth. The head of his cock is at the back of my throat, and I tilt my head back, giving him further access.
I love the salty taste of him. Love feeling his thickness pressing on my tongue. Even though I can’t move my lips, I do my best to run my tongue along the underside of his cock, right over the sensitive vein he has there.
He tightens his grip on me, his fingers threading through my hair and latching on. And it feels really fucking good. I like the image of him fucking my mouth.
“Nothing feels as good as this,” Max says, his words coming fast as his hips snap against my face. “You’re fucking amazing.”
Pride warms my chest, and I relax my throat more, until I feel him bottom out. Feel his balls pressing against me with every push.
“Shit, Jude.” Max sucks in a breath. “I have to—”
I think he’s about to pull out, so I reach up and press a hand to his ass, holding him in place. Telling him I’ll take it.
He looks down at me, his face flushed and sweaty. Staring into his eyes, I slide a finger between his cheeks, then push it into his ass.
He comes immediately with a shout, pouring down my throat.
He’s gorgeous no matter what, but I especially love how he looks like this. His eyes squeezed tight, his mouth open. His skin is red and blotchy, and his chest heaves like he’s been running. He looks fucking amazing.
I stand to catch him as his knees weaken. He makes being vulnerable look so easy.
When I guide him to sit on the bed, he wastes no time before reaching up and loosening the tie on the gag. As soon as he pulls it off, he grabs the back of my neck and pulls me down to kiss me.
“You’re so beautiful,” Max says, the words rushed. “You took me so well. You don’t even know how fucking hot you are, do you?”
I laugh a little, the sound full of relief. I did it. I gave him a piece of me, and the world didn’t implode. I climb into his lap and kiss him again and again, trying to show him how much it means to me that he was so gentle when he didn’t have to be.
***
When I leave Max’s place, I feel incredible. And it’s not the several orgasms I had there. Being with him is like being in another world. One where Grant doesn’t exist and all I’ll ever feel is safe.
I reach Rowan’s apartment building and step into the empty lobby. The floors have just been waxed, and my footsteps echo loudly as I cross the lobby to reach the elevators. It dings almost as soon as I hit the button, and I step inside. Just as I’m reaching to close the doors, a hand snakes between them, holding them open.
I back up to give the new person some room, and my stomach drops when I realize it’s Grant. Every good feeling Max gave me disappears, and all I can focus on is Grant. His heavy cologne fills my senses, and I almost gag at the familiar scent.
Before I even think, I’m lunging for the door. Grant shoves his arm in front of me, wrapping it around my stomach. Then he shoves me into the back wall, hard enough to make my head slam against it.
The doors close as I gasp and try to get the world to stop spinning.
“What the fuck have you been thinking?” Grant demands, his voice low and full of disgust. “Your daddy would roll over in his grave if he could see what you’ve become.”
I shake my head, even though I’m not sure why. No words will come out of my mouth, and I’m too scared to try getting around him again.
Once the elevator rises a bit, Grant reaches behind himself and flicks the stop button. The elevator lurches and then halts, and I grip the metal railing so hard that my knuckles ache.
“It’s been a long time,” Grant whispers. “But there’s no boyfriend to save you now, is there? Get those clothes off.”
