“Fine,” Dillon snarled and grabbed Tanya’s hand. He walked over to Peri and placed his hand on her arm. “This better not backfire in my face.”
“Dealing with women always backfires, wolf. At your age, that’s something you should have learned a long time ago.”
* * *
Lilly staredat the cell phone in her hand. Two days had passed since the dinner with the other warlock clans, and she’d finally found it and had been staring at it for the better part of an hour. She needed to call Jacque and let her daughter know she was okay, but that would be a huge ass lie.
Lilly wasn’t okay. In fact, she was pretty sure she was having a break from reality, a well-and-truly psychotic episode. Unfortunately, the vision she’d had of Cypher wasn’t her last. He continued to visit her. And while she took comfort in the sight of him, she knew what was happening couldn’t be good for her mental health. To make matters worse, she’d had visions of other people as well. She’d had arguments with Dillon. And she’d even pleaded with Tanya, Dillon’s mate whom she’d never even said a full sentence to, for forgiveness for being with Dillon first. That had come after having a nightmare that Cypher was now in the afterlife, no longer burdened with the worries of this life, and had probably found some other beautiful afterlife warlock … and they’d been sipping pixie wine on a golden beach. Hell, it was probably some past lover that died in battle that he’d never told her about.
Lilly was losing it. She was abso-freaking-losing it, and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it. No matter how many times she told herself she was being irrational, the thoughts she’d formulated in her mind didn’t change. The thoughts made complete sense to her because, well,to her,they were real. And she really had no experience with which to deal with these newfound hallucinations, as she’d always been fairly mentally healthy. She’d had mild depression before, but nothing that compared to this.
Lilly hadn’t left her room in days. Food had been brought to her, but she’d requested it be left at the door. She’d only stepped out to get it when she knew the servant delivering it had gone. Gerick had come multiple times to check on her, but she always sent him away, assuring him she merely needed time alone.
The sprite queen had even come. The woman had simply walked right into Lilly’s room, uninvited. Stupid, powerful sprite. Before she’d left, Lilly had asked Andora to ward the room so that no one, not even a high fae, could pop in on her. The queen must have seen the desperation in her eyes because she’d acquiesced without question. Not two hours later, Peri had been pounding on her door, threatening to blow it up if Lilly didn’t open it. She hadn’t. The fae left, which made Lilly more worried than if she had broken the door down.
Now, the phone was staring at her, judging her, accusing her. What kind of mother doesn’t call her child in a time like this, if nothing but to simply reassure her offspring that she’s not going to throw herself off a cliff? Perhaps she couldn’t call her daughter and tell her this because it wasn’t true. Maybe losing Cypher was punishment for being with one of the Great Luna’s wolves who had belonged to another. Maybe it was punishment for a multitude of other sins. Or maybe this was just how her life was supposed to go. She was just destined to be heartbroken and alone.
“DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF?” She yelled at the empty room. “PULL IT TOGETHER, LILLY PIERCE.” It wasn’t the first time she’d screamed at herself for having a ridiculous pity party. It didn’t help. She only cried more. If she were honest with herself, Lilly would admit she just wanted a reason. She wanted to know why it had to behim. Why Cypher? He was the freaking king of a race that desperately needed his knowledge and wisdom. What good did it do to take him?
But no answer came. The Great Luna hadn’t made an appearance. There’d been no dreams containing wisdom and encouragement. There’d been only memories, pain, regret, fears, and more tears. That left her with only one conclusion: punishment. Everyone had to answer for their wrongdoings. And Lilly was answering for hers. How was she supposed to face her daughter with that hanging over her head?
She jumped when there was a knock on her door, and then a deep voice called out, “Lilly?”
Her brow furrowed. That sounded like… “Dillon?” Mother of warlocks, was she hallucinating about her ex now? Was there no end to her depravity? It wasn’t enough to sleep with the man knowing he had a soul mate, now she had to bring him into her delusions.
“Lilly?” This was a feminine voice she didn’t recognize. “It’s Tanya. Can we come in?”
Andthereit is. Her delusion was bringing what she needed. She needed the woman she’d wronged to come and make things right by beating the shit out of her. It was the only logical course of action. Lilly had no doubt she would beat the shit out of the woman Cypher was currently with—lounging on some perfect afterlife beach sipping a perfect freaking martini, no doubt wearing a perfect damn bikini. And now she was Dr.-flipping-Seuss with the rhymes.
“Open the door, queenie,” Peri’s voice joined the group. “This is an intervention.”
“What the…” Lilly said under her breath, her confusion complete. Why would Peri be in her delusion? Well, it wouldn’t be farfetched for the fae to bring a bag of popcorn to watch the soap opera that was about to unfold. “Why the hell not?” Lilly said as she walked over to the door, turned the lock, and pulled it open. She had no idea what she looked like to her visitors. She’d covered the mirrors. She hadn’t cared to know what crazy looked like. Based on the wide eyes staring back at her, it was pretty damn bad.
“Can we come in?” Tanya, the small, beautiful woman who wasn’t having a psychotic break, asked.
“I’ve been waiting on you,” Lilly said, as she stood back and motioned for them to enter. She glanced down at her clothes and was happy to see she was at least wearing pants—old jeans with holes in the knees. She also wore a shirt, not exactly clean, but at least vomit free.
“You have?” Peri asked.
“Yep,” Lilly nodded. “I know I have to pay for what I’ve done. I’ve already lost Cypher. So, this is the next step, facing the woman I scorned, facing the man I fornicated with. Dealing with—”
“It’s worse than I thought,” Peri said, cutting her off. She held out her hand, and the phone that had been in Lilly’s palm flew toward the high fae, who deftly plucked it out of the air.
“Hey! I was going to call Jacque,” she snapped.
“Not in this state you’re not. You’d give her a complex.”
“I may be having my own complex, but it’s not like they’re contagious,” Lilly grumbled as she slammed the door closed.
“Actually,” Peri said coolly, “when your daughter is already in quite a state of alarm herself, hearing her mother say she had to pay penance for fornicating with her father might actually make her crazy, too. Let’s not find out.”
Lilly stared blankly at Peri who simply stared back. When Lilly could no longer take the cool glare of the fae, she turned to face Dillon and Tanya. She felt relief as she saw no jealousy in the female alpha’s eyes. Despite the dreams and memories she’d been having of Dillon, the emotions that had once been there were long gone.
Lilly looked at Tanya and only saw pain in her eyes. “You’re not here to accuse me or yell at me, are you?”
Tanya’s brow furrowed. “No, Lilly. I have never felt any ill will toward you.”
“Buthewas yours. Even before you were born, the Great Luna destined him foryou.” Why was she building a case for the woman who currentlydidn’tseem to want to rip her head off? Did Lilly subconsciouslywantthe woman to attack her? Probably. Hell, she had invented an afterlife lover for her dead mate. At this point she didn’t think she could surprise herself by anything she said or did.
