Coco’s confession to Kennedy changes nothing. There’s nowhere for us to go. She played me, and I fell for it. No matter what happens or what she learns—I’ve never been good at forgiving.
Once I settle into bed, I close my eyes. Sleep should take me quickly, but all I see is her.
The way she laughs.
The smell of her hair.
The glint of light off that fucking lip piercing that first caught my attention.
But most of all, I feel the betrayal in the most visceral way. Not even the sweetness of her pussy or the way I fell in love with her can overcome the treachery.
25
Kennedy
It’s been almosta month since Nix spoke to me. I keep waiting for the hollowness inside me to fade as time passes, but instead, it gets worse.
Every time I see him, I feel the loss of what we had all over again. The intensity that first drew me to him is stronger than ever. His eyes seem darker and his jaw seems tighter. Every time I lock eyes with him at the Loft, I spend those couple seconds searching to decipher his feelings. Does he miss me? Would he consider forgiving me if I asked again?
I’d ask as many times as it took if I felt even a flicker of hope, but I haven’t seen one yet. Nix is closed off, our time together apparently nothing but a regrettable mistake to him.
Hassan, on the other hand, is more into me than ever. He’s made me his sole focus at the Loft, other than business. I think he heard about Nix and me before things went bad, and he must not have liked it. I’m playing it as cool as I can, but he doesn’t make it easy.
I’m on his arm tonight, my black corset and platinum blond wig drawing stares as he leads me across the club. We walk through the kitchen, and as soon as we’re alone in the elevator, he grabs my hips and shoves me back against the wall.
“You can’t wear something like that in here and expect me to behave,” he says darkly. “I’ve had enough of your cock teasing.”
It’s all I can do to keep my hands at my sides. My head hit the elevator wall hard, and I want to dick-punch Hassan so bad right now.
“I’m done waiting, Eva. I’m fucking that self-righteous smirk off your face tonight.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “Warm a girl up first, Alex.”
He shakes his head. “I don’t give a shit if you’re warm. Every man in this place wants you right now, and I’m the only one who can have you.”
“Says who?”
“Saysme.” He steps forward and wraps a hand around my throat.
My heart is pounding in my ears when the elevator doors slide open. The hardest part of my job is knowing how to defend myself, but holding back from doing it to keep my cover. My wide eyes are locked on Hassan, trying to find a balance between defiance and compliance. It’s a fine line.
The guards on the other side of the elevator doors don’t even blink when they see Hassan with his hand around my throat. He’s not squeezing, but he’s applying enough pressure to remind me who’s boss.
Asshole.
He leans forward and kisses me then, his taste of cigars and alcohol making me queasy. Then he releases my throat, adjusts his tie, and steps out of the elevator.
“Evening, gentlemen,” he says to the guards.
“Mr. Hassan,” one of them responds. They both nod at him and ignore me.
I hate this place. Everything about it revolts me. The greed and callousness I see at the Loft every night still astound me. Weapons deals are made with no regard for the lives that will be lost. A hitman has been coming down here for a couple weeks, and the basement drug lords have been booking jobs with him.
As much as I’m disgusted by it, seeing these people in action drives me to execute my job perfectly. I don’t miss a beat. Ending this place is my goal, and that’s always at the front of my mind.
The hardest thing I’ve ever done was coming back down here the first time after the blowout with Nix. Knowing how furious he was, I had to trust him with my life. If he had exposed me as a Greenlight agent, I never would have come back up from that trip down here, unless my dead body was stuffed into a suitcase or a duffel bag.
But as angry as he was, I knew Nix wouldn’t want me dead. I’d lobbied the Greenlight director hard to let me continue at the Loft. He’d told me I was crazy for not taking a new location assignment.
