“Reid—”
“But I did bite back the worst of it.”
She mutters something I don’t catch. “Well, that’s good. Do you think…is the trip salvageable?”
I think of the look on Nikolai’s face when he walked away. The guilt on Hayden’s. The rage on Walker’s.
Progress. It feels like so much progress has been demolished in the span of an hour downstairs.
“Honestly.” My voice wobbles slightly. “I don’t know.”The kindling of hope inside of me flickers dangerously low after burning bright just earlier this morning.
I change the subject, telling her about my hike this morning and how I’d like to bring her for a weekend sometime. She follows my lead, taking over the conversation when she senses I need to just listen and zone out for a little bit. I’m sure there are things she needs to be doing to get ready for her afternoon, but she doesn’t rush me off the phone.
I know without a shadow of a doubt, she’d stay on with me all day if it’s what I needed.
I stare out at the horizon beyond. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For talking to me. For helping bring me back down the cliff I almost walked over. It was your voice I heard in my head when I walked away earlier. You…you’ve made me a better person, Penny.”
Without meeting her again, I don’t know if I’d be here. If any of us would be here at this house, trying to repair our relationships. If I’m able to come out of this on good terms with each of the guys here with me, it’ll be thanks to her.
35
Reid
Itoss and turn, moonlight streaming in through the open window. A cool breeze whispers through the room but my skin is hot. The covers cling, growing uncomfortable.
No matter how long I lay with my eyes closed, sleep evades me. With a curse, I throw the sheets off and slip out of my room into the quiet house. I don’t want to turn on a light and risk waking anyone else, so I run my hand along the wall to help me find the stairs. But once I get to the bottom floor, there’s a soft glow emanating from the kitchen.
I stumble over to find Hayden hunched over a bowl of cereal at the tiny nook table. He startles at my appearance, spoon clattering against the side of the bowl.
“Shit,” he mutters. “I was trying to be quiet.”
“You didn’t wake me.” I go to the fridge and pull out a bottle of water. “I haven’t slept.”
“Me neither,” he says around a bite of food. He’s shirtless,like me, his dark tattoos stark in the soft glow of the small lamp on the counter. He points at the chair across from him with his spoon. “You can sit if you want.”
Hours ago, I wouldn’t have been able to. Still would’ve been too tempted to fight back, to spar with him, but after talking with Penny and taking the rest of the night separated from everyone else, I feel okay about joining him.
I’m still pissed.
But I don’t feel inclined to curse at him right now.
I uncap the water and take a long swig, allowing it to cool my throat. We sit in silence for a bit, me drinking and him eating. He finishes his bowl of cereal, but there’s still a bit of milk left. He dumps in a few more shakes of oats.
It almost makes me smile. He used to eat cereal every morning on tour. The boxes took up so much space in the limited cabinets we had, but he swore he needed it.
“I’m sorry about earlier.” He looks at me, and even in the dark lighting, I can see the regret he wears. “I didn’t—I didn’t know about Nikolai. If I did, I never would’ve…”
I lean back in my chair. “Brought up our private business?”
“I just—” He averts his eyes. “I was pissed.”
“That me and Walker were making amends? Isn’t that the whole point of this trip?”
“No. I mean, yes, kind of.” He drops his spoon in the bowl. “You two have spent so long being at odds. The same goes for us. And if you two patch things up, I guess I just started to wonder where that leaves us. Where it leavesme.”
