Walker and Hayden sit in stunned silence. I can’t stand to sit here while they process what Nikolai just told them while he sits inside by himself. Especially not when he felt backed into a corner to share it.
I level Hayden with a look that could scorch the earth around him. “Is that the clean slate you wanted?”
He opens his mouth to respond, but venom crawls up my throat. My heart races with anger as I look at him, tongue itching to throw darts his way, but I contain them. Swallow them down. It’s not easy, breaking habits, but I’m fuckingtrying.
And that’s exactly why without another word, I get up and walk away.
34
Reid
Nikolai shut himself in his room. I tried to get in to talk to him, but he called through the shut door, “I just need some space.” I heard Jane’s muffled voice on the phone and knew he was getting support from the person he truly needed it from.
So I went to my room, locked the door, and have been sitting out on my balcony for the last hour, stewing in my anger. I keep waiting to calm down a bit, to feel my heart settle, but it doesn’t.
My feet itch with the desire to trounce back downstairs, throw open the patio door, and fuel the fire. My knee bounces, prized to do just that.
Instead, I grab my phone.
“Just the man I was thinking about.” Her sweet, melodic voice rings through the line. The sound is like aloe to my burning nerves. “I didn’t want to interrupt your retreat, but I’ve been dying to say thank you for the three dozen roses that showed up at my door this morning.”
Despite everything that just happened with the guys, I smile. Picturing her opening the door, after calling me unromantic last night, to the sight of dozens of roses waiting to be hauled into her apartment.
“Would you like to take back what you said about signing yourself up for the least romantic person on the planet?”
She laughs, the sound airy and bright. “Alright, I take it back. Still not the best story of how you asked me to be your girlfriend but honestly, nothing about either of our life stories is very pretty.”
I chuckle along with her, anger fading to dull throb behind my eyes. “You’re right about that.”
“I think you also officially won over Marley and Sara with your surprise today. I let them take one of the arrangements into their room.”
“I didn’t know I hadn’t won them over yet.”
“Oh, well, you do now. And Macaroni would like to thank you for making sure that there were no toxic flowers in the bouquets.”
I roll my eyes, but I did search this morning before I placed the order to make sure that if the little fucker got around the flowers that they’re weren’t toxic to cats. “I’m sure he does. How’s your day going?”
“It’s been good. I actually got a call from the manager of that shelter I was telling you about. She asked me to come by tonight right before they close to meet her. I had to tell Kevin I’ll be in late, but that has to be good that she invited me to come in, right?”
“It’d be shitty of her to invite you in just to say she didn’t have any work for you to do,” I muse. “You’ll have to let me know how that goes.”
“I will.” She promises. “How’s your day been so far?”
I sigh and instantly she picks up on it. “What? What happened? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” A bird lands on the branch of a Joshua tree at the edge of the property line. It caws a few times, wings twitching. Something about watching the tiny free creature, talking to Penny…it centers me. “Things were going good up until about an hour ago.”
There’s shuffling on the other end of the line. Like she’s getting comfortable and someplace more private. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“We all sat down with good intentions, but uh—” I scratch the back of my neck. “Things just went off the rails.” I don’t particularly get into the details with her about Walker finding out about me and Jane. That’s still a sore subject with her, and it’s not my place to tell her Nikolai’s business. “I exited the conversation and came up to my room.”
“Really?” She sounds surprised.
I smirk. “Didn’t expect that of me, huh?”
“Not really,” she laughs. “I mean, I know you’re capable of it, but I’m proud of you for walking away rather than saying something you’ll regret and making it worse.”
My eyebrow twitches. “Well, I mean I didn’t walk awaycompletelysilent.”
