ROMAN
Fuck. I can’t wait until the four of you are here. How’s Antonio doing?
I grin, even if the feeling isn’t there. Roman cares so much for everyone. His heart is bigger than anyone would think, given his position.
JUDE
Okay. I’ve got him, he’ll be fine.
ROMAN
I know he will be, you’re the best. I just…worry about him, Lio, and Marcus.
JUDE
I know. But we’ve got them. *He* can’t hurt them anymore.
ROMAN
Damn right. Hurry up. I need snuggles.
I snort at that, making Antonio look up at me. I show him my screen, and he melts against me, his expression softening a little at the concern in Roman’s messages.
JUDE
Is anyone with you?
ROMAN
I’m in Hol’s office. But I can’t koala him because of my fucking ribs. So…snuggles. I don’t care what Dr. Ranlen says. You, me, Hol, Ten, Lio, and Antonio. Benjamin can join too, if he wants, but I need you three, and Lio and Antonio need us after all *that*.
JUDE
We’ll make it work, Tesoro Mio.
ROMAN
Yeah. Love you. Hurry up and come snuggle me.
JUDE
See you soon.
Putting my phone away, I hold my Boy even closer. “I love you,” I say into his hair.
Antonio leans into me enough that he’s almost in my lap, and if I didn’t care about his safety, I'd sayfuck itand pull him onto my lap, but I can’t, not now. Roman’s idea of a snuggle pile doesn’t sound so claustrophobic, not when it has everyone I need in one place.
Luca leaves me with the taste of his piss on my tongue, my ass stretched out so painfully that it feels like there’s a damn hot poker stuck in there, and my heart fucking obliterated. He’s learned too well and I want to rally against it, but fuck knows I can’t. Not when I’m the villain in this fucking story. Every punishment—every poison dripped word—has branded itself on my soul.
My mind wants to retreat, to get away from this, but there’s nowhere for me to escape to. The sins of my past have come calling, and this time, instead of being the one to mete out punishment, I’m meeting it.
I drag a jagged breath in, as my jaw remains open uncomfortably, and I have to remind myself that I’m Il Padrone—I’m above this bullshit. I can take whatever he throws at me.It’s not as bad as what my father and his friends doled out while I was growing up.
And yet…
Somehow, it’s far worse. I flinch from the thought. I knew my father and his sadistic friends didn't care for me. But Luca? And my Boys? They have always been the shining jewels of my collection, the ones I could count on. Now, here I am, at the mercy of one of them, and I know in my heart that even if the others knew, they wouldn’t intercede—hell, they’d probably join in.
How did it get this far? How did I sink this low? How…
