Jared
It ends in lightness.
The whole beach is bathed in sunshine as I stand at the altar, which is really just an arch of white roses in front of crooked rows of chairs on the sand.
Sunlight bounces off the water like someone scattered diamonds across the waves.
But nothing is as bright as the man who is currently walking down the aisle toward me. His platinum-blond hair is spiked up in defiance of the beach breeze, and he’s dressed in a purple suit—not his velvet one, but a new one purchased for the wedding that has subtle sparkles in the fabric that catch the light.
I’m wearing his choice too, a light-blue linen suit that Felix declared “beachy but sophisticated.” I was more than happy to hand the aesthetic choices of our wedding over to Felix, knowing he would create something that felt like us.
I’ve loved seeing him embracing color over the last two years, first in his own outfits, where he began wearing brighter clothes, not worrying anymore about attracting people’s stares. And thenin our apartment, where the walls are now painted bright colors with framed pictures drawn by Emmy, adding to the vibrant, chaotic look.
Emmy leads the way down the aisle in front of Felix, diligently scattering shells as she goes. Sophie, Felix, and Emmy went out to the beach this morning after breakfast to collect the shells. I’d looked out the window at one point to see Felix showing Sophie something on his phone that made her throw her head back and laugh while Emmy built elaborate shell patterns at their feet.
That’s probably the biggest surprise of the last two years, the friendship that has sprung up between Sophie and Felix.
Spending time with both of them was awkward at first, with Felix cracking jokes that landed like lead balloons while Sophie answered in single syllables, both of them looking to me for rescue.
But my soon-to-be husband is the kindest and most forgiving person I’ve ever met.
He suggested we do a family therapy session that included Sophie, and to my surprise, she agreed. Annie had made Sophie and Felix talk directly to each other instead of through me, which led to forty minutes of uncomfortable conversation. Sophie confessed she still had nightmares about the accident. Felix admitted he’d spent months wondering if he’d been distracted or texting, torturing himself with possibilities, and how much he resented the fact that she hadn’t told the truth at the time.
The turning point was when Felix told Sophie that hating her would mean hating the reason he met me, and that was impossible. Sophie had broken down completely then, and Felix had moved to sit beside her, letting her cry on his shoulder while I sat there trying not to break down myself.
They’d ended the session by agreeing to let Emmy be their bridge to a better relationship.
Then, a few months later, they’d discovered a mutual love of terrible reality dating shows that they watch together while sending each other commentary texts. Which then turned into shopping trips together because it turned out Felix was the ultimate guru at hunting through charity shops to spot designer labels at a fraction of what they’d usually cost.
Now, I think Sophie talks to Felix more than she does to me. Apparently, he’s far superior in giving advice about her love life.
It’s weird thinking that three years ago, I didn’t even know Felix existed, and now Sophie threatens to disown me if I ever hurt him. Not that I would, considering he’s currently walking toward me looking like every single one of my dreams decided to show up at once.
Felix stops right before the altar, looking at me with mock seriousness. “Before we do this, I need to know something vital. Will there be brownies for every major life event?”
“Obviously. I already have a batch planned for our first anniversary,” I reply
“Then I guess I’ll marry you.” He steps forward to take my hands, grinning.
Emmy races off to join Sophie in the front row, who is smiling widely.
The celebrant grins as well. “Well, now that the brownie negotiations are settled, shall we make this official?”
“Yes,” I say.
“Definitely,” Felix replies.
“Welcome everyone to the beach, to the sand currently destroying your nice shoes, and to the wedding of Felix and Jared,” the celebrant begins. “Felix and Jared want to keep this short and sweet, so we’ll get straight to the good part. They’vewritten their own vows, which they’ll now share with each other and all of you.”
Felix pulls out his phone, his hands shaking slightly. “I wrote these at three a.m., when you were snoring and Patches was judging me for being awake, so bear with me.”
He takes a breath. “Jared, I met you at the worst moment of my life, when I was broken and bleeding and making inappropriate jokes about geology. You stayed with me in the darkness, literally and figuratively. You not only saved me, but you made me strong enough to save myself, and to be able to be the partner you deserve. You laugh at my terrible jokes, you let me reorganize our spice rack by color instead of alphabet, like a normal person, and you never made me feel like my scars were something to hide. I love you more than Patches loves knocking things off counters, which is saying something.”
The crowd laughs, which gives me a second to compose myself.
I still can’t believe I’m lucky enough to marry this man.
Especially when I’d convinced myself that the secret I held inside me would poison the roots of our relationship before anything real could grow.
