I shake their hands, repeating their names in my head in the hopes that I’ll remember them.
“And this guy here,” Adam points to an even younger man with dark blond hair, a sharp jawline, and deep-set eyes, “is my youngest brother, Joe. You have to watch him. He thinks he’s a ladies’ man and is a relentless flirt.”
“Hey, I can’t help it if the ladies like me better than they like an old grump like you.” Joe stands and hugs Adam before hetakes my hand and lightly kisses the top. “Pleasure. Let me know when you’re ready to have some real fun, and we can ditch the geezer.”
“Easy now, bro.” Adam scowls before he squeezes Joe’s shoulders.
The table erupts into laughter. I can’t help but join them. There’s a possessiveness to the way Adam addresses his brother’s banter, and I can’t deny it’s hot. Not that I belong to Adam, but I sense if I did, every man, woman, and creature surrounding us would know it.
“Cami, come sit with me.” Rachel’s contagious smile grows as she waves me over. “I’m so glad you came. None of these guys are married. Well, Ross is, but his wife rarely joins us. It’s nice to have another woman around.”
“Someone has to watch the kids.” Ross pipes up in defense of his wife’s absence.
“Get a babysitter, dude.” Joe leans back in his seat with a devilish grin. It’s easy to see that Joe’s the troublemaker out of the Langdon brothers. He has a mischievous air about him that I have no doubt drives the young girls wild.
Matt takes a drink of his wine before he speaks to Ross. “I’ve told you a million times, Momma would be happy to watch them along with Emmie. Plus, Emmie would love to have other kids to play with.”
“Is Emmie your daughter?” I ask.
“Yeah,” Matt’s smile grows, but there’s a flicker of sadness in his eyes. I know that sadness because I share it. Rachel said Ross is the only one married. I want to ask for more from Matt, but it doesn’t seem appropriate.
Instead, I settle in next to Rachel, and we spend the evening talking about all the fun activities taking place in Watercress Falls this summer. Apparently, this is a town defined by summer festivals. There’s one scheduled nearly every weekend duringtourist season. I never really went to festivals back home, and I’m excited about attending them. It’ll be a new experience.
Adam is sitting across the table from me, next to his brothers. Every time I look his way, his eyes are on me, and a wave of heat washes over me. I’m not sure how to handle all these feelings swarming inside me. Once again, I ask myself if it’s really as simple as just letting myself have him.
From where I sit, the only person standing in my way is me.
Adam offersto walk me to my door.
I don’t object.
Tonight was fun, and I’m not ready for it to end. I’m not sure where I want this evening to go, but I know I’m not ready for him to leave me just yet.
But where do I take it from here? This is new territory for me, and I don’t know how to act. Do I invite him in? Say goodnight at the door? Linger on the front porch to give him time to make a move?
Hell, do I even want him to make a move? I think about that for a second, and the answer comes so clearly.
Yes! Yes, I do.
I’ve wavered back and forth all week on what I want from Adam versus what I think I can give. Every ounce of my being screams at me, telling me how much I want him. But the sentimental part of my brain rejects the idea of letting a man who is not Mark touch me. My heart is still aching over that loss.
But Mark wouldn’t want me to hang onto him like this and not live my life. He’d probably hate how hard this has been for me. It’s past time I let myself heal, but for the life of me, I’ve struggled with allowing that to happen.
I drop my head and sigh at that thought. That’s exactly what my mother has been telling me since the accident.All you have to do is decide you want to heal. Only then will you begin to move past the loss.I hated when she spoke those words. They’re harsh and blunt. I ignored her because I was so certain she was wrong.
Maybe there’s truth to her words, and it’s just her delivery that sucks. Mother never could show compassion properly.
Maybe finding something I want is all the catalyst I need to get me to see that I’m the one standing in my way. Not Mark’s memory.
I open the front door and leave it open, putting the decision of what happens next in Adam’s hands.
My heart rate kicks up several notches when I hear the click of the door behind him. I push all thoughts of Mark and my guilt aside and focus on the now. Adam is here, and I want him.
I can let myself have this.
I set my keys in the bowl on the small table in the foyer and pause. I’m too nervous to turn around and face him. But that doesn’t matter because he takes control and spins me around.
His arm slides around my waist while his other hand grasps my neck. He pulls me flush against him and breathes in deep.
