Yes, the temporary pleasure I would feel from taking her necklace would be intense, but the guilt that followed wasn’t worth it. She was my friend, and it would break her heart to lose that chain.
My palms started to itch as she said, “I’m sorry, Harper. If Hudson found out I told you anything, he’d be upset.”
She suddenly looked like a kicked puppy, and that guilt I was attempting to avoid slipped in through the cracks anyway.
Pushing my hands into the pockets of my jeans, I smiled. “It’s fine.” My voice came out higher than expected. “Don’t worry about it. It’s none of my business anyway, not really.”
“I imagine he’ll speak to you about it. Once he gets his head around what’s in there.”
I doubted that. Phoenix had always been private about his past, the parts he could remember anyway. I knew he went into care at five, but he wasn’t a sharer by any means. Though he kneweverythingthere was to know about my sordid past. My father, my mother, the fire, and how I’d almost died that night. The only thing he didn’t know about was my criminal urges. They’d developed later, after he’d left the Jacksons' place.
“We’ll see,” I replied, that wave of sadness widening. My voice was much quieter.
Molly put a supportive hand on my shoulder. “He cares about you, Harper. You know that.”
My gaze sharpened. Did I?
I forced a smile, but it was brittle and hollow, and then a fist hit my door, making us both jump. Molly dropped her arm like she’d been burned (no pun intended). “Harper, you got my girl in there?” Hudson boomed. Fuck, his voice was loud, even with the door closed.
Molly’s entire body came to life, and her face lifted, like she’d just won the fricking lottery. Under normal circumstances, I’d be making the universal vomit sign by pretending to stick my fingers down my throat, but I just rolled my eyes.
“Yes, dick. She’s here,” I replied. A flicker of unease crossed Molly’s face at my rudeness, but I held up a hand to express that it was fine. Hudson and I always bounced off each other, almost like I imagined a proper brother and sister would. I liked it; it gave me a sense of normality in a house full of hormonal men.
“Less of the name-calling, Baby Sawyer,” he scolded, tacking on their annoying nickname for me. “Time to go, English.” Hudson fisted the door again. He could have just walked in; the doors didn’t lock, but I knew he wouldn’t. The boys had always stuck to that one rule. Ma had warned that if any of them ever came into my room without my permission that she’d hand them their balls. My privacy whilst living with four large, manly boys had always been protected. Even when we fought, Phoenix had never barged into my bedroom.
Molly chuckled. He called her English for obvious reasons; we’d all gotten used to that now.
“Don’t tell Hudson about the kiss,” I whispered, knowing that she wouldn’t; just like she wouldn’t tell me what her boyfriend knew about Phoenix’s past either. We hadn’t known each other that long, but I trusted Molly implicitly. She’d also seen the physical scars on my body, so I told her what made me an orphan after a few short weeks of knowing her. The girl had never blabbed a word to anyone. Not even Hudson. Although I had a vague feeling he knew anyway. He’d seen my shoulder.
She started to fan out her hair and pinched her cheeks, beautifying herself for her man. It should have been pathetic, but she made it look sweet. “Of course I won’t say anything.”
“Thanks, Mols.” Another thump against the door. Keep your panties on already!
“I'd better go before he beats down the door. Keep me posted, and remember what I said.”
Returning her smile, I allowed her to pull me in for a hug. “Good luck with the test.” And then she left.
I didn’t open my door to extend our goodbye; the chance of seeing her sucking face with my foster brother was too probable. They were usually all over each other. The sexual pull between the two of them made you feel pregnant just by watching them.
Remember what I said. Molly’s words swam back.He cares about you.
Yeah, well, he had a funny way of showing it.
When we were kids, I had spilled my guts to Phoenix. He knew all the gory details of my life, the issues from my past,beforewe had met. As I mentioned, he didn’t know the new ones I had inherited when he’d left me with the Jacksons and the Barker twins.
As I said, I liked to help myself to shit that wasn’t mine.
My twisted addiction started with the simplest thing: hiding something from my foster sister, Daisy. I remember the pleasure I felt from witnessing her looking for it. As the months rolled by, that craving I had to take stuff got stronger.
Stealing was the one thing that gave me a sense of control and a feeling of power.
And when I mentioned that it was a trait I had inherited, I wasn’t lying. My father had been a criminal before he killed himself and my mother.
Dad had been a top accountant for a prestigious law firm in the city. After years of faithful service, he was busted for having taken some money that didn’t belong to him. He’d been forced into that position to stop us losing our home. Due to abad investment, unbeknownst to his family, my father was going bankrupt. So, he embezzled some money from work and got caught.
I remember him explaining the situation to both my mother and me. He had been in bits. There had been shouting with mom threatening to leave him and take me with her. Stuff in the house was smashed. Life in that house had always been loud.
It was ugly, but not as ugly as what came next.
