“He is,” I answer, keeping my eyes locked on him. Her eyes follow my gaze. She glances directly at the spot Kai is standing in.
“I can’t see him,” she whispers quietly. She reaches her hand out, hovering near his shoulder. Kai stares intently at her with a mournful expression. “I can’t—I can’t even feel him.”
“I’m here, Irie. I’ve always been here.” He brushes a tear away. “We’ve got to go, Jasper. I’ll take care of her tonight.”
“Kai wants you to know he’s always been here,” I rasp. “I’ll let you go tonight, love, but that doesnotmean I’m letting you go for good.”
“I’ll see you back in the Cove,” she says. Kai wraps his arm around her, emitting a subtle golden glow and leads her away. The longer he holds his arm around her, the more her slumped shoulders rise. As I watch her slip away into the night, coldness seeps in, and suddenly, my world seems a hell of a lot dimmer than it was before.
Thirty-Six
Iris
As I wander through the dim forest further and further away from Jasper, my mind spins endlessly. Angels are real. Kai is an angel. He is apparently my guardian angel. Supposedly, he has been here the entire time, meaning he never even really left. How is this possible? As a little girl, I used to fantasize about folklore. I could never have imagined any of the beings I dreamed about actually existing. Feeling lightheaded, I glance up at the crescent moon and close my eyes, attempting to steady my breathing. None of this makes sense. I stand outside the entrance to the ballroom and take a long, deep breath, collecting myself before walking back inside to retrieve my belongings. Onmy way back outside after grabbing my belongings, someone stops me. To my surprise, it’s tonight’s majesty herself.
“Iris, I’m so glad you could make it!” She smiles, but upon further observation of my tear-stained cheeks, her smile turns into a frown. “Oh, honey. Believe it or not, tonight has been emotional for me, too. I nearly lost it when I looked at the spot we saved for him.” She rubs my back. If only she knew that this isn’t the only reason behind my tears.
“Thank you for inviting me, Katherine—saving a spot for Kai meant the world to me.” I smile warmly, masking my inner emotions as well as I can.
“Do you think he joined us tonight?” she asks, hope gleaming in her gaze. “I mean, I know there’s no way to know for sure, but did you feel him here?”
My eyes water again. Of course. Just when I thought I was done crying for the evening. “I know he was here, Katherine.”
Her honey-brown eyes brim with tears. “Please reach out if you ever need anything at all. I mean it.” She pulls me in for a fierce hug. “I’ll always think of you as a little sister.”
“That means more than you know. I hate to leave early, but something came up.” I pull away. “Wishing you all the happiness in the world.” She sends me off with a big grin. Instead of hitching a ride back to the Cove, I do something uncharacteristic. I book a ride to a different location—one I had zero intentions of visiting anytime soon, but after the night I’ve had, all of my common sense has evidently evaded me.
I lift the third gray stone lining the pathway to the front door and pick up a single key. Then, I sneak into the pristine home as quiet as a mouse, stumbling through the dark, avoiding any and all objects blocking my path to his office. Once inside the office, I sort through all the keys in the top drawer of his desk. Thankfully, my parents aren’t home, otherwise this could have been a rather uncomfortable situation. I couldn’t bear to talk to them right now.
“Bet you’re laughing at me as we speak, huh,” I grumble to thin air. Why can’t I see or feel him here? Why is it Jasper can and I can’t? I would do anything to interact with him again.Anything. “Help your girl out—which key is it again?”
I’m met with silence. Predictably. Maybe I should’ve had Jasper give me a ride back to the Cove. After all, I would love nothing more than to have a two-way conversation with my dead brother through my boyfriend. I chuckle aloud at how insane that sounds.Goodness, this can't be happening.Once I find the key to my old car, I plan on driving it as fast as possible the entire way back to the Cove. Maybe then, Kai will reveal himself to me. This might be the perfect excuse to drive my old car again.
How many keys does my father have?Finally, I locate the key to my old car and hastily walk back toward the front door in the dark, bumping into a decorative statue on the way, nearly knocking it over. Right before reaching the front door, I catch sight of something I haven’t seen in a long time. I walk toward the large painted family portrait on the wall. This portrait includes my brother, parents, and myself. In the painting, we all are gazing at Kai as he glows. I read the custom vinyl calligraphy below it.
Kai Nicholas Greene (1994-2021)
Our beloved son, brother, friend, and coach. May our son, who held the sun in his smile, rest in peace.
Suddenly, I feel cold. I can’t pinpoint when I started crying again, but based on how wet my cheeks are, I’d say I started a while ago. Instead of walking out the front door, I backtrack, making my way toward the stairs. I barely land on the bottom step before my knees give out. In an instant, I’m crashing to the ground. My stomach twists in knots, then I hear low wailing, and to my horror, I discover it’smywailing. I rock myself back and forth on the bottom step and attempt to reign my tears back in, but it’s no use. As my heart physically aches, I realize I can’t breathe.
“Kai, where are you? Where are you right now? I need you,” I whisper frantically as my breathing grows more and more rapid. “Kai,please,” I beg. A few seconds later, I feel warmth spreading across my entire body, starting at my shoulders. I look up to see someone sitting beside me on the staircase, wrapping their arms around me. Through my tear-filled blurred vision, I realize who it is. It’s someone I never would’ve expected to see.
“Mom?” I ask quietly. She continues to hold me tight, unwavering. She says nothing, but her hold on me is strong. Instead of fighting her embrace, I lean into it. She cradles me. After several moments of embracing each other, I break away and glimpse into her blue eyes.
“I’m sorry I broke in and attempted to steal my car back,” I mutter. She barely cracks a smile, but nevertheless, a smile from her is a rarity, no matter how small.
“You would’ve gotten away with it, too, but your father and I both had a feeling we needed to get home immediately.” Her voice trails off. “It was the strangest thing. Lo and behold, I find you here.”
“I see,” I say, recognizing exactly what this means. “Well, I should head back to the Cove; thank you.”
“I insist you stay the night here; the mountain roads aren’t safe—especially at night,” she states firmly. “You can stay in your oldroom. It looks the same anyway.” Do I want to stay overnight? No. But should I? Probably. I sigh and nod, agreeing to stay.
We head up to my old room, and she wasn’t exaggerating; it looks like it hasn’t been touched since the last time I saw it. One thing I can appreciate about my mom is she doesn’t linger—as soon as she shows me to my room, she says good night, giving me the space I’m craving. I check my phone before settling in.
Jasper
Please, tell me you’re safe.
