‘Sooner or later people will find out.’
‘But you might appreciate thelateroption.’ He held her gaze. ‘You have a lot you want to say. I understand. I have quite a bit to say myself. The bridge between us will have to be crossed, even if you might think that I’m not the man you thought I was.’
Ella breathed in deeply.
He was right. Right that they were where they were, right that being on constant attack wouldn’t change anything. A bomb had detonated in the very heart of his well-ordered life and he’d somehow taken it in his stride. It didn’t matter how angry she was, how much his very presence made her realise the fool she’d been. She raged that he was acting like an adult and his cool, sensible response wasn’t what she wanted, because what did she want—a declaration that he’d suddenly realised that she’d meant more to him than a fleeting romp between the sheets? She’d meant nothing to him when it came to any emotional bond. He’d come back to see if they could temporarily pick up where they’d left off and she loathed that thathurt.
Shame at her own weakness and determination to hang onto her pride stiffened her, and she pursed her lips tightly.
‘If you tell me where we’re going, I can meet you there once I’ve fetched my coat.’
‘My hotel.’
‘That’s the last place I’m going,’ Ella said with scathing dismissal.
‘What’s the problem with that?’
‘BecauseI don’t want to. Because I would rather we have this conversation on neutral territory.’
For a few seconds Rocco didn’t say anything and then he shrugged. ‘Ella, the hotel is in Dublin, half an hour away by taxi. There’s a very big, very comfortable breakfast area where we can continue this conversation in complete privacy.’
Ella thought about all the people she knew in the store and in town. She hadn’t kept her pregnancy a secret; what would have been the point? She’d vaguely said something and nothing about an affair that hadn’t worked out, somehow making it sound as though she had been having a clandestine relationship for weeks, maybe months. No one knew the identity of the father. She’d never been an open book and everyone had been respectful of her reticence. Including her father, even though she had seen the disappointment and concern on his face when she’d broken the news to him.
The horror of ever confessing that she’d had a fling with a guy who had walked away without a backward glance and, worse, had done his utmost to make sure she didn’t get in touch with him, hadn’t borne thinking about. Did she want to be seen with Rocco in the local café where Sheila, the town gossip, would serve them tea and then promptly relay the sighting on the local grapevine? Dublin at least guaranteed anonymity and he was right: when it came to the world finding out, thelateroption held definite appeal.
‘My driver will take me there and I’ll pay for you to take a taxi. We can be assured of privacy without any curious looks or conclusions being formed, because I guess everyone knows that you’re pregnant.’
‘Noteveryone’sin the dark. I’m four months’ pregnant. It’s not something I can keep to myself for ever. It’s just that no one knows who the father of my baby is.’
Rocco tilted his head to the side and looked at her in silence for a few seconds. He would have to tread carefully. Perhaps, for the first time in a life in which he was accustomed to having all orders obeyed and all needs immediately met, Rocco was discovering what it felt like to run headlong into an immovable roadblock.
The very thing that had beguiled him—her lack of awe of what he could bring to the table financially—was now the very thing that stood in the way of the most logical conclusion to this situation. She’d been positively insulted at the insinuation that she might be impressed by his wealth. She couldn’t be swayed by any amount of money and, whatever they’d shared, her opinion of him now couldn’t be lower. She barely liked him. She had spun him the story about the fate of the staff as a way of measuring his worth just to see whether she should even bother to tell him about the pregnancy. If he’d shut down the conversation without discussion, he uneasily suspected she would have withheld the news about the pregnancy, judging him to be the sort of guy a kid is better off without.
Maybe in due course, when their child had become old enough to be curious, she might have done something about that. He’d never considered fatherhood with any immediacy but, now that it had been thrust upon him, he was very clear on what he wanted. Doing the honourable thing was top of the list. He had been raised to value duty, after all, to value the virtue of responsibility. Right now, he was skating on thin ice when it came to achieving his goal.
He couldn’t fault her hostility. She had been open and trusting with him, had confided in him and, in return, she had been repaid with what she would see as colossal betrayal. Rocco knew that if he were to suggest the honourable thing—marriage for the sake of their baby—she would recoil in horror. As she’dtold him, he was the last person she would ever again want to be involved with.
But he was going to marry her. That was a given. He was going to give his flesh and blood the legacy he or she deserved, the legacy that was their natural birthright.
He told her the name of the hotel where he was staying, and watched the way she lowered her eyes. What would she be thinking? That this five star hotel was the last place she would have associated with the man she’d thought he was? The guy she’d trusted?
Rocco thought of the houses, the cars, his mansion in London…of the exalted background he had so carefully hidden from her.
It was what it was and hewasgoing to get what he wanted. He wasn’t used to playing the long game but choices seemed thin on the ground at the moment.
‘It must have been scary for you, Ella,’ he murmured now, pausing by the door to look down at her with genuine sympathy. ‘No, don’t say anything. We can talk about all of this when we’re at the hotel. I’ll give you time to tell the boss that you won’t be in today.’
‘For a couple of hours, at any rate.’
‘Let’s not put a timeline on the discussion we’re going to have to have. You…you don’t look pregnant.’
‘Don’t you believe me?’
‘Can you try to stop attacking me? That’s not what I meant. I believe you. I wasn’t as careful with protection as I should have been so, trust me, I not only believe you but I take full responsibility for…this situation.’
‘I’m not blameless.’ She looked at him mutinously, then lowered her eyes again. ‘It’s nearly four months,’ she said. ‘From everything I’ve read, you don’t really show with a first pregnancy until later on.’
Rocco glanced at his watch. ‘Let’s say I meet you at twelve? Gives you quite some time here to do whatever urgent things you might have to do…’
