Pete: Later x
The package Charliesent is waiting by my front door when I get home the following evening. Cooper gives it a quick sniff before deciding there’s nothing edible inside and quickly loses interest. It’s got a bit of weight to it when I pick it up, and the familiar shape draws a smile out of me.
I’m already ninety percent sure I know what it is by the time I get inside and set it on the counter. I’m full-on grinning when I open it and find the next two books in his mystery/suspense/horror series.
Maybe,just maybe, I’m not the only one who wanted to leave a reminder.
Pete: Thank you for the books
Charlie: You’re welcome. Hopefully you weren’t lying about loving the first one, otherwise things are going to get awkward real quick
He’s added a couple of laughing emojis but I can almost feel the undercurrent of doubt in the words.
Pete: I wasn’t lying
Charlie: Well in that case, I hope you love them as much as the first one
Pete: I’m sure I will
I just wish you were here to talk about them with me.
We chat back and forth about our days, avoiding anything serious. I want to ask if he misses me like I miss him, but it’s only been one day. Pretty sure that’ll send him running for the hills. Instead, I tell him about Cooper, send him a few pictures of him looking unbearably cute in the Christmas hat Sadie stuck on his head with a lot of bribery.
Eventually, Charlie has to go to meet Seb and I sigh as I set my phone down next to the books. I ask Alexa to play a local radio station to get rid of the quiet and glance around at my home with another wistful sigh. I’ve taken down the mistletoe since we brought Cooper home, but everything else Charlie and I put up taunts me with Christmas cheer that I’m struggling to feel with him gone.
I know it’s ridiculous.
I was happy in my life before he came here. It shouldn’t be this hard to get that back.
It is though.
So fucking hard.
He barrelled into my life like a tornado, and the wreckage left behind is devastating.
I roll my eyes and scowl at the sappy Christmas songs playing in the background. Mariah is way too on point for my liking.
Jesus, Pete.
Stop being so fucking dramatic.
Charlie hasn’t said no to more. He hasn’t said yes, either, but that’s beside the point. And he’s only a few hours down the road, not the other side of the world. Though after having him so close for the past week, it sure feels like it.
The closer itgets to Christmas Day, the more determined I am not to be a miserable arse just because Charlie has asked for time to sort out his feelings. I have friends and I have family and no good reason not to celebrate with them.
So that’s what I do.
I invite Sadie and Tim over for dinner, and I meet Jerry, Sean, and their better halves at the pub. No one avoids talking about Charlie—for which I could kiss them—but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt to be around people so obviously in love when I’m yet again on my own.
But it’s also fun and lovely and I’ve never appreciated them more.
After a little cajoling, I spend Christmas Eve with Sadie and Tim.
The food is amazing, their home warm and welcoming, and for a few wonderful hours, I forget that I’m a little heartbroken.
When it’s time to leave, my sister catches me in a tight hug. “You can stay here,” she says for about the tenth time this evening.
Even though my answer is the same, I still love that she’s asked. “Thank you, but I’d like to wake up in my own big bed, not that tiny thing you call a guest bed.”
