I shift my body to accommodate him and open my eyes, smiling when I notice him gazing down at me again. As he gently traces my hairline with the tip of his finger, I notice this blooming sensation stirring in my chest.
I’ve felt it before.
But not for him.
I felt it for the first boy to steal my heart, the man I thought I was going to marry, the ghost who seems to linger still.
Before I can stop them, my eyes glass with tears.
“What is it?” Tyrell whispers, shifting off me. “Am I hurting you? Did I hurt you?”
“No,” I whisper, shifting my butt back and pulling my knees to my chest. “That was amazing. Even better than the first time, and that’s saying a lot.”
My smile is fleeting, which means Tyrell doesn’t even smile at all.
He’s now perched on the edge of the bed like he’s seconds away from getting dressed, from bolting out the door if I tell him this is too much and I’m not ready.
But that’s not the truth.
I sniff, swiping a finger under my nose.
“What is it?” Tyrell reaches for me, curling his large hand over my knee. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No.” I shake my head again and smile at him, resting my hand over his and tracing the length of his fingers. “It’s not that. I just…” Brushing my teeth over my bottom lip, I wonder how to word this or if I should even be saying it at all.
“Dani,” he softly begs. “Please, talk to me.”
I swallow, plucking up my flailing courage and whispering, “Are we doing the right thing?”
“What do you mean?” Tyrell eyes me cautiously.
And I force the words out. “By Atlas. Do you think he’d mind us… being together?”
He glances at the rumpled bedsheets, his fingers trailing down my leg and covering my foot before he lets out a soft sigh and asks, “Where’s this coming from?”
I shrug, not even sure, really. Why am I once again letting epic sex be ruined by these thoughts?
“You’re the only other man I’ve ever been with,” I finally say. “I guess I really am moving on, and I… I don’t know why I’m struggling with it.”
Tyrell’s eyebrows dip together, his expression downright wounded as he tries to accept what I just said.
Shit. I don’t want to hurt him.
Gliding his hand off my foot and across the mattress, I feel the loss instantly and have to fight the urge to beg him to touch me again.
“But, um…” He clears his throat. “That’s what you wanted, though, right? To move on?”
“Yes.” I wrap my arms tighter around my legs. “I really want to let go and move forward, but…” I bite my lips together, a shudder rolling through me before I find the courage to say, “He should be here, Ty. If it weren’t for me, he’d still be alive.”
CHAPTER 34
TYRELL
Her soft statement slams into me like a sledgehammer.
What the fuck did she just say?
I gape at her for a second, trying to process it.
