“I didn’t know him like I know you, O. I feel like I can talk to you.” He set his hand on top of mine, and a warmth filled my chest as I felt the truth of his words.
“Good, because I would rather know, even if you thought I might be uncomfortable. I’d rather have an awkward moment than do anything that would hurt you.”
“And since we’re being so open, I have to admit, as much as you needed the limits of our no-messing-around rule because you were still coming to terms with how you felt about me, they made me feel safe too. Like I didn’t have to worry about us going too far, too soon.”
“I guess we both had our reasons for needing to take our time, but it’s been fun taking my time with you.”
He smiled before offering a tender kiss, which I eagerly reciprocated. I crawled over him as he lay on his back. And as we shared the exchange, I could still feel him shaking slightly.
A powerful sensation of rage stung in my chest—burning-hot fury. Everything in me, every sense, every awareness wanted him so badly to fulfill the fantasies I’d been running through in my mind on the jet ride over. Yet there was something else there too.
I pulled away, looking down at him, reading the tension on his face.
“Keegan, we’re not doing this.”
“Fuck, I shouldn’t have told you that story. I’ll be fine, O.”
“Yes, you will be fine,” I assured him. “Because we’re not doing this.”
“What?”
The way he asked it, wide-eyed, his mouth hanging open, I would’ve thought I was depriving him of something much more than sex. I quickly clarified, “No, I mean, we will do that, but I just… I was stupid to assume we could jump right into this as soon as I arrived. But I want to.”
“I need it, Owen.”
I rolled beside him. “Obviously, I need it too.” I indicated my crotch, which made him laugh.
Seeing his tension let up set me at ease.
He grabbed the bill of his cap and pulled it down so that it was slightly over his face. I pulled it back. “Keegan, clearly what happened with Brad was a result of moving too quickly.”
“I don’t think anyone can accuse us of rushing into anything.”
We shared a laugh. “No, I’m sure of that, but we can take a little more time. I’m not going anywhere this time. At least, I get a few weeks with you. It’s not a race to the finish line.”
“But I don’t want to move like a tortoise either.”
“Keegan, I love the fact that you want to fuck me, and I promise I will fuck you, but I think it’s best if we take a little—and I do mean very little—bit of time to ease you into this.”
“Like how much time?”
“Not exactly waiting until marriage,” I teased. “How about we go on a date?”
“A date?”
“Yes, a real date. We’ve had what I think most people would assume were dates, but I would like to actually go out with you now that we’re officially together.”
“Officially,” he said with a chuckle. “It’s kind of funny because technically we’ve been officially together to everybody, but unofficial with each other?”
He said it as though he was confusing himself trying to think through the logic.
“It’s probably best if you don’t overthink everything that’s happened since we started.”
“I like overthinking about us,” he said, his warm smile returning, assuring me that I hadn’t totally ruined the mood with my suggestion.
“So if it’s all right with you, one date,” I said. “We see how it goes, we come back here, and then I fuck you the way you deserve to be fucked.”
“Oh, that’s all the time you needed?”
