“All good, allgood.”
“More dance, less chitchat, Morgan and Westright. And that goes for you too, Sampsons,” Raul says, noticing that May and her husband have stopped once again to fuss at oneanother.
A few snickers and giggles fill the room as everyone enjoys some schadenfreude at the Sampsons’ expense. Despite Raul giving them a tough time, he steps in and assists them, correcting Bobby, the husband, who’s as insistent as ever that he heard totally different instructions than everyone else in theroom.
“See? We could be worse,” I whisper to Jesse, who puts his finger in front of his mouth to shushme.
After class, we head back to mycondo.
My lips are on his in no time as I push him through the front entrance and against the wall adjacent to the door. I’m hardly in control of my body as my hands find their way under hisshirt.
When I take a moment to catch my breath, Jesse murmurs, “I like the way you get aftertango.”
“Something about it makes me extra frisky. Perhaps being so close to you for so long, but not being able to take thingsfurther.”
“I figure Raul wouldn’t be so annoyed with the Sampsons if he was busy trying to keep you out of my ass most of theclass.”
“Well, he can’t stop me right now,” I say, grabbing his asscheek.
Jesse kisses me again, and we scramble to thebedroom.
It’s a struggle to move, keep our hands all over each other, and remove our clothes at the same time, but somehow we manage to accomplish the task, as we have so many times before. When we’re stark naked, he lies on top of me, his girth rubbing against my pelvis. I appreciate that he’s still in this leading role from dancing. He’s taking charge, taking what hewants.
One of the things we discussed in therapy was how Jesse could take on a more dominant role in the bedroom in ways that were comfortable to me, that didn’t act as a trigger. And being beneath him suits me just fine. I love being under him, his weight againstme.
He leans back and gazes down atme.
Jesse didn’t have to take on all the baggage I came with, but he stepped up to the plate. Even when I freaked out on him while we were camping, even when he found out why and all the bullshit I needed to deal with. He never gave up on me, instead taking my hand to guide me through theprocess.
In some ways, I feel broken because of those things I can’t give him in the bedroom. Initially, my biggest fear was that my limitations made me inadequate, but my time in therapy has assured me that this has never really been about me not being able to give Jesse something, to bottom for him. It’s been about something that was stripped from me. I always called myself a total top to avoid re-experiencing the pain I encountered at the hands of my uncle, but in reality, it had nothing to do with my preference. I never had the chance to make that choice. I’d never allowed myself to explore because of what that bastard did to me so longago.
Who knows if I’ll even likeit?
Although, I have a feeling I would love it, especially if I knew Jesse likedit.
I just know now that I deserve the chance to explore, to be free of the chains forced uponme.
I don’t know that I ever will be, not truly, but I deserve more than what I’ve allowed myself to experience sofar.
I thrust my cock upward against his body as he does the same with me, until we’re moving in a rhythm that reminds me of how in tune we were during our best moments in the studio thisevening.
Jesse leans down and props himself on his elbows so that his face is right before mine. He traces his thumb across the side of my face. “So chiseled. Such a perfect jawline. My beautiful, beautifulEric.”
“Funny. I was just thinking the same thing aboutyou.”
“Well, I don’t have thisjawline.”
“Yours is perfect, though. Just right for your face, and this body… All these perfect little features, but with a heart that somehow manages to surpass it all. I don’t know that your looks stand a chance at rivaling yoursoul.”
He blushes. “Eric, where is this coming fromtonight?”
I grab the back of his head, easing my fingers through his smooth locks, and he leans down a little farther before granting me apeck.
“I like your soft kisses,” I admit. “Well, I like your kisses, period. Hard.Soft.”
He jerks his hips forward. I’m not sure if it’s intentional or if his body is pushing him through the motion because of how aroused heis.
“Now your dick,” I say, “thatI always like hard,though.”
