She pinches her face together like she doesn’t want to tell me. “He was a lot of things, but I didn’t see him for any of them until I left and then the truth came out.”
I nod, understanding what she’s saying. I thought I was married to a completely honest man, yet the longer we were apart after the divorce the truth of who my husband was slowly seeped to the surface. Why couldn’t I see it before?
“Well you let us know if he causes any trouble because we’ve got your back,” Anessa says, pointing between her and Tabitha, who hides the knife in the small sink behind the counter.
Emma squeals, drawing my attention, and I look over to find her face covered in chocolate. You can’t even see her nose holes she has so much shoved up them. It’s like I put the cupcake down on the table and she smashed her face into it trying to get as much chocolate in her mouth as quickly as possible. Crispin searches me with his eyes in a pleading look as he holds Emma on his lap while trying his best not to touch any of her parts covered in sticky chocolate.
Emma flails her hands wildly, and she hits him in the chin, splattering frosting all over his jaw. Crispin’s mouth falls open in disgust and he closes his eyes.
“I hope Spencer can take still shots in the video feed because we need this moment to live on forever,” Tabitha says not taking her eyes off Crispin. “Did you hear that, Spencer?” she questions, loudly at the camera she must believe is in the corner of the room. “Still shots!”
“So sorry.” I go to his side and relieve him of Emma so he can go to the bathroom and clean up. Emma doesn’t care at all. She squishes the cupcake with her hand and squeals, smashing a few last bites in her mouth. The door to the bakery opens, and a customer walks in as I work to clean up the crumbles of chocolate cupcake surrounding Emma on the floor. No one seems to mind or bother she’s made a huge mess. For just a second, during the brief period Emma lets me sit peacefully, my eyes circle the bakery and I breathe a sigh of relief. I may have been searching most of my life, but the time has finally come. I found where I belong.
A bit of wind— a cool blast off the ocean’s waves — twists my hair and pushes past where Nate, Emma, and I walk along the beach. Emma squeals in her stroller. She’s always loved to be near the water.
“Are you cold?” Nate asks, looking at the goosebumps running across my arms.
I wipe them away and they stay gone. “No, every once in a while the breeze picks up, but I’m not ready to go back.”
We spent the day together, walking the beach hand in hand. Emma played in the sand, knocking down all the tall sand castles Nate worked so desperately hard to build for her. It was a wonderful afternoon. The sun warmed my skin, and the birds squawked in the sky while the waves crashed against the shore. It has been one of those days I’ll remember for the rest of my life but each time I’ll wonder if it was as amazing as I recall. It’ll seem too good to be true.
But that’s what it is. Perfect.
Nate stops and then pushes down the parking brake on the stroller. He stares out into the water with his attention slowly working its way down the sky and stares at the waves as they crash on the shore.
“I wasn’t sure what I expected to find what I moved here, but it’s gorgeous.”
Together we stare out at the view and I nod standing next to him. I’ve lived near the water most my life, but there’s something special about the way the bay comes in and the land forms around the sea at large. Pelican Bay has its own special ocean, just for the lucky people who know of this place.
“So many people think of beautiful sunsets on the water happening in the South like Florida or California, but it’s just gorgeous up here.” Maine is so misunderstood.
“I thought this was something you only see in Florida.”
Wait until Nate sees his first whale. It may not be as warm in this part of northern Maine but it’s beautiful.
“I can see myself spending the rest of my life here,” he says, and it’s so nonchalant he doesn’t notice how his words affect me.
But they do. Was there a point in time he hadn’t planned to live here forever? “Do you plan to leave?” I ask, trying my best not to be shaken by fear.
“No, not now,” he says, not taking his eyes from the view. “When I first moved, I wasn’t so sure I’d make it. I’m used to the big city and Pelican Bay is far from city life.”
I laugh. Most of Maine is far from city life. “Was growing up in LA fun?” I’ve never been, but being surrounded by celebrities seems like it could have its perks.
Contrary to what I expect, Nate shakes his head. “A lot of smog, cars, and homeless. People think of Hollywood and the celebrities, but there’s many more people who are barely making it than those who live in mansions.”
There’s an income difference here as well. Not everyone lives in large mansions like Pierce Kensington. Most people have medium to even small-sized homes packed together in the downtown area. And even those cost a fortune. If you polled the people of Pelican Bay, most wouldn’t even say they wanted the big mansion but preferred a little cabin in the woods surrounded by nature. Life is simpler here and in most people’s opinions a lot better that way. I agree with them.
“Maybe for Christmas I’ll go home and visit my family,” he says and then his eyes fall to Emma. “If you’re allowed to go?”
The question isn’t direct, but I understand what he’s asking. We’ve had this discussion before about who gets Emma on holidays. Barry doesn’t care for most of them, but Christmas is one he makes me alternate.
“I’ll check the calendar and see if this year is my turn have Emma for Christmas.” I hate the idea of having to spend a holiday without her. A part of me hopes my ex will stop caring and let me keep her every year, but that makes me a bad mother. Her father should be in her life even if I hate him.
“Either way we’ll make sure Emma has a great Christmas.”
My breath stalls and then picks up quickly. Nate may not realize what he’s said, but I do. My heart and brain both jump in glee. He is thinking about what we’ll be doing this holiday season — which is months away, an entire summer and fall. I haven’t even thought about Christmas yet. I’m still trying to survive this month.
Nate checks his watch and then unlocks the stroller and walks down the sidewalk, which separates the public beach from the rest of Pelican Bay.
