“You know what they say. Pride comes before the fall,” Amanda, our resident bookworm quotes from somewhere.
Marissa nods in agreement then keeps going with her advice. “I understand how you’re feeling. I even understand why you’re upset. I just think you'll get over it eventually, but by then it might be too late. The whole pride thing, like Amanda said.” She grabs the end of my cart to stop my forward movement and waits until I meet her eyes.
“I’d hate for you to lose Finn over this. And not because of the money, but because he makes you happy. You can let your anger fester and ruin a good thing, a relationship that brought you more joy than I’ve seen from you in years. Or you can find it in yourself to move on and get over it. Trust me, Sweetie, there are much worse things a man can do to you than lie about having a few dollars in the bank.”
Marissa’s reminder of her own failed relationship brings tears to my eyes. How stupid can my entire situation be compared to what she’s had to deal with in the last few weeks? Once again I wish I had hit Cody with that glass.
I move to the jean jacket section and while trying on a battered dark colored denim jacket, I realize I want to forgive Finn. I want to forgive him, I just don’t know how and I worry I’m going to have to eat some crow on this one.
“So, how do I forgive him?” I ask both girls. They’re always full of advice and this time I actually want it.
Marissa rounds on me, the excitement clear in her eyes. “So, you’re upset with him, that’s okay. Be upset, but give him the chance to apologize. Hear him out." She stops and thinks about her words. “And then once he’s verbally apologized, make him apologize again with a trip to the Caribbean. It’s not like he can’t afford it.” She laughs after.
*
I round the third flight of stairs and stop to adjust the white paper with “lost” written in all caps at the top. A grainy picture of a grey tabby takes up the middle with a phone number below. I'm willing to spend precious seconds realigning this poster if it helps Mittens find his family. Plus fixing the crooked sign adds at least another twenty seconds on my trip to the fourth floor. A trip I’m dreading but know I have to make.
I’ll need a furry companion if Finn doesn’t accept my apology. It’s a great idea except for Rule 1: No pets of any kind. Not even goldfish. Who considers goldfish to be an actual pet? I stop to practice what I plan to say.
“Finn, I may have overreacted earlier this morning. I was upset that I had to learn about a major piece of you from the newspaper. Even my brother knew before I did. The thought you lied about something so big hurt my feelings.”
It’s as far as I’ve gotten on my walk home from shopping. It sucks. I hope I’ll get through the first sentence, cry and then he'll jump in with his own apology and spare me having to come up with more. I’ll admit I may have overreacted with my actions this morning, but what Finn did still isn’t cool. Having money doesn't excuse his fault in this either.
Just because he’s cute, funny, sweet, kind, nerdy, adorable, and makes me laugh doesn’t take way from the fact he lied. The fact his lie was about money doesn’t excuse it from being wrong. Seriously, if it wasn’t for his easy going demeanor or the way I can’t help but smile when I’m around him, Finn wouldn't be worth it, money or not. Okay, even I can’t make myself believe that lie. He’s totally worth it.
I didn’t need to know what was in his bank account to fall head over heels for this man. He had me the night I slept against him after we played Dragons Reborn together. I never would have guessed I’d fall for a gamer, but in the end it was his playful boyish attitude toward life that endeared him to me the most. I’ll admit I’m a giant dumbass if it gives me another chance with Finn.
I bypass my door and continue down the hall to Finn’s apartment. I need to do this now before I lose my nerve. My hand shakes, but I raise it and knock on his door twice. Time creeps along as I wait on this side. Maybe he isn’t home. I consider turning around and calling him but knock once more to be safe. As the door creaks open I take one last breath and prepare to grovel.
“Maple?”
A portion of her body is hidden, but enough peeks past into the visible area as the girl from last night dangles from Finn’s door. Britney, his ex-girlfriend. She’s no longer wearing her baby blue semi inappropriate dress. Now she's practically naked in a thin white t-shirt which covers her ass only because it’s long on her. I don’t think the protection would stick if she bent over.
All thoughts plummet from my mind. Why in the hell is she here? Why is she here and wearing that? My mind rotates through all the shirts Finn has worn around me as I try to place if this is from his closet or not.
“Um, it’s Aspen.” I finally correct her. I’ve never seen Finn in this shirt, but the big Mario mushroom on the front doesn’t help the odds it isn’t his.
“Right, I knew it was a tree.” She tries to close the door, but my hand shoots out to stop it before the latch connects.
I have a mission and I’m not going to let this blonde bitch keep me from it. “Is Finn here?”
I do my best to look as if her presence hasn’t affected me. From the way her eyes roll up and down me and the following smirk, I don’t think I’m successful. Britney's eyes dart to the back of the apartment giving away the fact Finn is somewhere in there but not coming to the door.
“Sorry, Maple, he’s a little indisposed right now.”
I wipe away a wet spot under my eye that is most certainly not a tear and turn to leave.
“Wait,” her plea stills my steps. “I’m sorry. Finn called me and told me his girlfriend dumped him. We talked and reconnected. We didn’t mean for it to happen, but we share a history. I’ve been with him from the beginning.” Britney's face is grim and for a second I wonder if she does feel bad.
“It’s okay.”
I actually tell her it’s okay for stealing my boyfriend before I turn back around and continue on to my apartment. The door closes behind me and I fall to my bed before the tears begin to flow down my face. As much as I want to hate Britney and her big puffy lips, I can’t. She didn't steal my boyfriend. I gave him up when I dumped him this morning. She just swooped in and picked up the pieces I created.
I’ve known Finn a short time, but he carved a place not only in my heart, but in my home as well. Everywhere I look reminds me of him. Staying here is too much to handle. I can’t stand the thought of hearing the night time activities that go on between a newly reconciled Finn and Britney. I’ve already ruined my life. I don’t need to be reminded of my epic fuck up.
