There was the complication of all of us liking her. Ry and Zay even thought about sharing her, which was interesting in its own merit. I wasn’t the most likable guy. The guy that wouldn't go dancing in a crowded room. The guy you couldn't giggle with all night with joy. I was the steadfast stalker that would be in the shadows and watch you like a hawk, making sure no one bothered you and made sure you ended up on my arm for the night.
I knew I had things lacking, social skills and the like, but with Ry and Zay picking up the slack these past two days, it didn’t feel like she minded. Sometimes she would dance with Ry and Zay, sometimes she would sit with me. She had a gift for being able to split her time between us evenly and not let anyone feel left out.
I took a chance and moved my arms around her, hugging her from behind. She relaxed into me as she yelled at the guys that whoever could drink one more and dance in a circle five times would get a kiss. She then looked up at me and placed a peck on my lips, saying that I deserved one for keeping her warm. It was times like this, it felt like she was feeling the same way for me I felt for her.
As I held her in my arms, I had this nagging feeling in the back of my head that I needed to tell her all of this. I needed to tell her how I felt.
I know that me and the guys talked, and that we promised to not say anything, to keep a tight lid on it until after the festival, but something inside of me told me I couldn’t wait. I needed her to know.
The guys came over, smiling like loons as they both fell to the floor in the fourth circle, and she smiled as she pushed up and out of my arms. “Then I guess that means you both get a kiss.”
She leaned in and kissed Ry first. As soon as their lips met, he grabbed the back of her head and kissed her like his life was on the line. It was all lips, teeth, and tongue like they couldn’t get enough of each other. When they broke apart, they were both panting, looking at each other like they didn’t want it to stop.
Zay grazed his hand underneath her chin and slowly turned her head towards him before he captured her lips with his. Their kiss was different. It was like Zay had all the time in the world as Mika immediately melted into him, sighing at the kiss as it slowly turned into a fiery inferno of lust and need. This time, she broke away and laid back onto me exhausted, yet giving Zay a naughty look like she wanted more.
She looked to the side and quietly said, “It looks like we should get going. They’re closing up for the night.” Mika nodded toward the pub owner that was staring us down as he turned the chairs over onto the tables. I nodded, and we all headed out the door as fast as we could.
The cool breeze hit me in the face as we went outside, and I knew it was going to be a chilly night. Mika took a step towards the inn she told us she was staying at, the opposite direction of our guilds, but I didn’t care. “Want me to walk you home?” I asked, hoping she would say yes and I could snag another kiss from her at her door.
She surprised the ever-loving shit out of me as she looked at the three of us, bit her lip in embarrassment as she said, “Why don’t you all come and stay the night… with me?”
Zay and Ry immediately stepped forward, saying, of course. She looked at me, her eyes telling me she wanted me too, but I just didn’t know. I was frozen stiff until she came up and slid her hand into mine, giving it a squeeze as she whispered, “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” But the problem isn’t that I didn’t want to, it was that I wanted desperately to.
She took a step towards the inn, keeping her hand on me loose so that I could still choose how far I wanted to take this, but I quickly gripped it, not wanting to ever let go of her. She looked down at our hands and smiled one of her pure and radiant smiles. I would follow her into a blazing fire to my death for just one of those smiles.
Zay and Ry also smiled at me, giving me a thumbs up behind her, but I pretended not to notice them. Didn’t they know they embarrassed me when they did that shit? Fucking idiot brothers.
We all walked to her inn, which wasn’t far away. Zay and Ry were laughing about something until we went up the stairs to her room, and she took out the key and opened the door. She looked at all of us and waved her hand in. “Come in.”
Zay and Ry both looked like they were battling each other for who got into her room first, but as soon as I was faced with what might happen after that door was closed, I knew I needed to talk to her. “Can I talk to you for a second?”
She looked at me in surprise but nodded as she poked her head in and told the guys we would be just a minute. I walked away from her door, away from prying ears, and she followed. I got to the edge of the staircase, looking down at the empty lobby of the inn as it was late and everyone else was asleep.
I turned towards her, grabbed her hands and blurted out, “I love you. I have loved you since the first moment I laid eyes on you. I know it's really soon but I also know it's real. I want to make you mine for the rest of my life. I don’t think I can live without you for another day. I feel like I have found my other person, my other half, and I want you to know that before we cross any more lines tonight. I want to be open and honest with you.”
I watched her face as I said every word that was on my mind. Her eyes started to tear up after I said ‘I love you’ and started to fall over as I mentioned the ‘rest of my life’ part. Some part of me thought I might’ve made a mistake, might’ve made things worse, so I backtracked when she said nothing.
“If you don’t feel the same way-” I started before she pulled me into her and placed a soft love filled kiss on my lips, reminding me why I was so enthralled by her.
She rested her forehead on mine as she closed her eyes and said, “Thank you, Jax. You three mean the world to me. Mean everything to me.” She cupped my cheeks, and I sank into her hand, loving the feel of her touch.
She kissed me again, this time with more excitement, more passion, and I was all here for it. I wrapped my arms around her as she started to walk backwards. I kept up with her, not wanting to break the kiss for anything until we got to her door.
Zay opened the door, immediately breaking the mood we had going as he whined, “Awww, did you guys start without us?”
Mika smiled as she kissed me again, mumbling between our lips, “You’re just in time,” and we both crossed the threshold.
Emerald’s satisfied sigh broke the memory, and I decided I wasn’t going to lay my heart out like that. I needed to do the opposite of what young Ajax did and wait until I knew for sure that she loved me, too. As I would think back to that day, I noticed that after my confession; she didn’t say she loved me back. She said I was everything to her, but she couldn’t say those words and it made me think she knew she was going to leave that morning, no matter what I said.
So even if what I felt for Emerald was deeper, more complete than what I felt for Mika, I knew I wasn’t going to go all in until I heard those words from her. Once those words passed her lips, there would be no going back. I would leave the guild for her if that’s what she wanted, but I needed her to say those words.
“We need to head back.” She croaked out as she tried to clear her throat.
“I think I heard that before…” I joked, letting her know I at least heard that part.
She lightly smacked my chest, missing the spot where she cut me as she smiled at me. I realized her smile reminded me so much of Mika’s. It’s a shame she doesn’t smile more often.
We quickly got cleaned up and dressed. I carried her back to the beach so she wouldn’t get wet. She grumbled about being more than capable of walking herself but when she laid her head on my chest, I knew I made the right choice and stayed silent as she grumbled. When we got to the sandy beach she tugged on me and I let her down gently with a growl of disapproval. She snagged my hand and we walked hand in hand to the lighthouse. My soul felt almost complete, just waiting for three little words.
