“I appreciate that, but I’ll be fine.”
She nods. “If you change your mind, let me know.”
“Thanks.” I bump her shoulder with mine. “Enjoy your class.”
“One can never go wrong with the workings of Poe. Have I taught you nothing?”
Raven winks at me before turning away and heading indoors. I make my way to the lecture hall for Professor Ames’s class, my good mood instantly plummeting. As much as I wish I had a normal life, I don’t. Not only is my foster brother an assassin, but so is my… boyfriend? Lover?
How am I supposed to navigate the holidays with two trained killers in my life?
Over the past few weeks, ever since I told Ben that I didn’t reciprocate his romantic feelings, he’s been standoffish. It’s understandable, but that doesn’t mean the distance between us doesn’t bother me. However, if I were in his position, I’d want the space and time to regroup. Out of respect for him, that’s what I’ve done since the second Trial. Sometimes, I think it’s only made things more awkward.
I push open the door to the building, and the warmth from the inside rushes out, chasing away the chill on my skin. As I head toward the room, my phone buzzes inside my pocket. I’m quick to retrieve it. The second I read Xavier’s name across the screen, my pulse kicks up a notch.
Xavier: I need to speak to you. Meet me in the library after your class.
Delilah: What’s wrong?
Xavier: Nothing out of the ordinary. Why? Are you worried about me?
Delilah: Of course.
Xavier: Is it because you love me?
Delilah: Bye.
Xavier: You can’t resist me forever.
Delilah: I’ll do my best.
Xavier: You do that. Before you become Mrs. Xavier Donovan, you will love me.
Delilah: Keep dreaming.
Xavier: I love that mouth of yours.
Delilah: What about my middle finger?
Xavier: That too.
Delilah: ?? I’ll see you soon.
Xavier: I fucking love you.
Delilah: Thank you.
Xavier: lol You’re welcome, little raptor.
Slipping the phone back into my pocket, I continue down the hallway, my mind a whirl of conflicting emotions. Ever since Xavier confessed to being in love with me that night in the library garden, he’s been relentless in getting me to say it back. Not only that, but he takes every opportunity to tell me that he loves me.
Like the man himself, it’s overwhelming at times.
Even so, I can’t deny I enjoy it. The affection. The commitment. The attention. It feeds a starved part of my soul that’s been malnourished all my life.
I compose my features and walk into the classroom. After finding my usual seat and settling in, I pull out my laptop, wrangling my thoughts so I can focus on the upcoming lecture. Despite my best efforts, my mind drifts back to Xavier. To the raw desperation in his voice as he declared his love under a starlit sky. The words he spoke were passionate but revealed a depth of vulnerability that I’ve never seen in him before.
How do I return that type of love?
