I understand that now.
“Carina?” He drags his fingers down the valley of my breasts to fondle me between my legs. “Are you still with me?”
Not in the way I want.
The unbidden thought startles me. Before, I wanted to have sex with him because I was almost insane with lust, and even though I’m aroused now, it’s not enough to produce that line of thinking. Especially since I want to sleep with him for both sexual pleasure and emotional intimacy.
“Yes,” I whisper, grateful my face is hidden. If it wasn’t, I’m positive he’d be able to tell something’s wrong.
“Come on then. Let’s get you to bed.”
Within a few minutes, Rafael has me out of the tub, towel dried, and settled on his comfortable mattress. I lie there watching him run a fresh towel over his body, admiring it, and when he catches me his expression goes from relaxed to sharp.
He quirks a brow. “See something you like?”
I shrug, although I’m sure my face says it all. He always seems to know what I’m thinking and I assume that’s how, but I don’t care anymore. He’s gotten past all my defenses and discovered all my secrets, so what does it matter if Rafael knows I desire him? As if my begging from earlier wasn’t enough of a clue.
“I see something I like as well.” The towel falls to the floor, completely forgotten as he prowls toward the bed. Toward me. He climbs onto the mattress and cages me in with his body hovering above mine, his hands planted on either side of my head and his legs surrounding my hips. “Do you understand why everything happened the way it did?”
I stare up at him and the earnestness in his gaze shoots straight to my heart. “You were worried about me because I did something stupid.”
“And why do you suppose that is?”
“You want the information on the flash drive that was in my apartment.” A yawn sneaks up on me and I cover my mouth. “And the only way to get that was to keep me safe.”
He traces the shape of my eyebrow and then my lips. “Is that the only reason I came after you?”
“What else is there?” I scrunch my face in confusion. “And once you have it, we won’t need to get married.”
He rears back a bit and his lips thin. “What about your punishment?”
I gnaw on my bottom lip while thinking. His expression hasn’t really changed, but something between us has. Or I said something that caused his body to tense and his energy to become abrasive.
“Because you wanted me to see you and your intentions clearly, and how I almost sabotaged our deal,” I say. “And that’s easy for me because I’m a photographer and I see things most people don’t.”
He drops his forehead to rest against mine and blows out a stream of air against my face that’s pleasant. “What do you see when you look at me, Carina?”
“An asshole. A sexy asshole, but one all the same.”
His stern countenance fades into reluctant amusement. “And you’re a spoiled brat.”
The battle for me to stay awake has gone on for long enough and my eyes drift closed. “No, I’m ahorny, spoiled brat.”
Rafael laughs quietly and positions himself next to me and when the mattress dips a little because of his weight, I roll into him. He adjusts me so that I’m lying against his chest with my front pressed to the length of his side, and one arm wrapped around my waist.
“Go to sleep,viziata. I’ve already told you that I don’t fuck the deceased, and you’re pretty much dead to the world.”
He goes quiet but I can sense he’s still awake. Not only because he’s absently running his fingers along my hip but because his breathing hasn’t slowed.
“When I look at you, Rafael, I see a dark knight. A man who’s not afraid to do the dirty work or whatever it takes to save someone.”
I don’t get a verbal response from him and if I did, I passed out before I could hear it. However, the way he held me tighter as I drifted off to sleep told me that I was right in my assessment of him.
My fiancé is a hero.
My hero.
And soon to be my husband.
