Alexander and Janie walked a half mile down the beach, in the opposite direction of the bonfire, and sat huddled together,listening to the rushing water and one another’s breath. Alexander didn’t want to tell her what he’d seen in the basement. He was too frightened of all of it. Janie seemed miffed about whatever had happened to her as well.
But finally, Alexander admitted something to pierce the darkness. “My dad said Chloe is Nina’s mother.”
Janie’s jaw dropped. She squeezed his hand hard. All she could manage to say was, “Poor Chloe. Oh, that’s so hard.”
They held the silence for a long time until, very suddenly, their nostrils filled with the smell of fire and ash, and they heard the sounds of sirens screaming through the night.
The White Oak Lodge was on fire.
Chapter Twenty-Two
August 2025
Nantucket Island
It was hours after Alexander and Janie finished their meal at Vincent’s restaurant. Like teenagers with nowhere else to be, they wandered down Madequecham Beach, their hands loosely laced, watching the moon’s reflection in the surging waves. A storm was coming. Alexander could feel it in his bones. At fifty-one, he felt ancient.
He couldn’t believe his wife had agreed to leave the restaurant and drive around with him. He couldn’t believe she’d listened to what he had to say—and forgiven him for his silence.
Now, Janie stopped walking. Alexander stopped a step or two ahead and turned to look at her. Even many years after their first meeting, he still believed Janie was the most beautiful woman in the world. It had been hilarious to everyone that the woman he’d bailed on that night, Belle, had gone on to be a top model and a sometime actress. But Alexander had hardly thought of Belleat all through the years. His heart had always belonged to Janie (when he hadn’t given it away so entirely to his career).
“I felt so guilty,” Alexander said, when the silence became too much for him. “I was down there, in the tunnels, surrounded by Tio Angelo’s drug money and his literal stash, and I didn’t do anything but vaguely threaten him. All I wanted was to get away from Nantucket, to get you away from my family and all our secrets. But I wasn’t thinking clearly.” He wet his lips, and they immediately chapped in the rogue winds.
Together, they remembered what had happened after the fire had broken out at the Lodge. They’d been together a half mile down the beach, but then they’d sprinted back toward the Lodge, their chests burning as they inhaled the smoke. When they’d reached the property, they’d hung back, watching as firefighters helped Lodge guests to safety. Francesca was off to the side, sobbing outrageously, and little Nina was sitting cross-legged, a bit away from everyone, watching the fire intently, almost as though it was more of a curiosity than a fear.
“The minute we realized it was on fire, I was terrified of Tio Angelo,” Alexander admitted now, kicking the sand. “I didn’t know what he’d done. I thought he was trying to frame me for the fire. I imagined my father and mother rebuking me, turning their back on me. I imagined everything I knew crumbling.” Alexander laughed sadly. “It’s ironic that that scared me so much since we wanted to leave anyway. But I felt cursed. I cared too much.”
Janie reached up and gently touched his head. Her eyes swelled with love.
“We didn’t hear that Dad, Jack, and Tio Angelo were dead till the next day,” Alexander remembered. “That’s when the guilt really ate me up.”
“I remember,” Janie whispered. “You barely got out of bed for days and days.”
“Because I was the last person in the tunnels with them,” Alexander said. “I thought it was up to me to get them out.”
Janie stepped toward him and wrapped her arms around him. “It wasn’t your fault. None of it was.”
Alexander shook violently. Rage and guilt and shame spun through him. He realized he’d carried these emotions for nearly thirty years, and they’d been instrumental in tearing him apart. “It didn’t even occur to me that they hadn’t had proper funerals for, like, months. By then, we were miles and miles away.”
“We were trying to forget,” Janie agreed. “But you should have told me what you saw down there. You should have told me about the photographs your uncle took.”
“I keep thinking that’s what those journalists have on me,” Alexander whispered. “I’ve been running from those photographs my entire life.” He swallowed. “In the 2000s, I hired a private detective to try to find Jack, Dad, and Tio Angelo, but he wasn’t able to. The noise died down for a little while, but recently it picked up again. And I can’t fully understand why. But it must be Tio Angelo. It must be him, chasing me, teasing me, trying to ruin my life.”
“Do you think he started the fire?” Janie asked.
“I’ve never understood why he would,” Alexander said. “He had the perfect setup.”
Janie held the silence. Alexander let himself remember the beautiful worlds they’d created in the years after the fire. He remembered how, when he’d finally gotten out of bed at the bed-and-breakfast in downtown Nantucket, she’d been waiting with the car, and they’d taken off. First, they’d driven to Michigan, where they’d stayed at a lake cottage on a lake and refused to read the news and allowed themselves to come down emotionally from everything that had happened. But after that, they’d driven to Idaho, to Wyoming, to Utah, to San Jose. They’d run all over the world together, trying to shake off the past.Alexander hadn’t liked talking about the night of the fire. He hadn’t liked the mention of his dead father and dead brother. Janie had learned not to bring them up.
When Alexander got into Purdue University’s flight program, he had wept with joy, and Janie threw herself into becoming the best emotional co-pilot, eager to help him achieve his dreams.
With so much to do and so much to see and so much to achieve, they’d waited a little while to have kids. Xander was seventeen now, which meant Alexander was thirty-four when he was born. By then, he’d been with Janie for thirteen years. He was a pilot. They’d moved to Los Angeles to continue to build their family and see the sun more often.
It had been their home for what felt like forever.
Now, Janie checked her phone for the time and whispered, “The kids are probably still up, if you want to come see them.”
Alexander’s heart nearly exploded.
