“It’s not you,” I said, the laughter dying in my throat. “I’m just not sure why you assumed I was a virgin. Are the women in your tribe virgins until they mate? Do you carry them to the bridal suite on a palanquin?”
He twisted his mouth to the side, half amused by my remark but confusion swimming in his eyes. “No, but a woman of your caliber doesn’t give it away to just any man.”
I spun around and folded my arms. “This one did.”
I felt the heat of his body closing in on me.
“I don’t believe you.”
“Believe it. My ignorant decision almost destroyed my father’s pack.”
He led me to the mattress to sit and then knelt before me. “There’s no sin in bedding a man.”
“No, but he was one of my packmates.” When Tak grimaced, I wanted to disappear. “People expect more from the Packmaster’s daughter. I let an older man seduce me, and part of me wanted to give it away to someone I didn’t love.”
Tak tilted his head. “Why?”
I’d never shared my reasoning behind it with anyone, and the idea of defending my actions aloud felt freeing. “Because… my father has no sons of his own—no alpha male child to one day align with his pack or even lead it. He loves Lakota, but I’m his only natural child. My dream was to sell jewelry, and his dream for me was to mate with an alpha.”
“You didn’t want a mate?”
I shrugged. “My father loves me blindly. He never acknowledged my faults—my weaknesses. He just assumed an alpha would find me desirable and I would have my happily-ever-after, but that’s not how it works. I wanted to please my father, and I knew he would always worry for me if I never found a strong man to be my life mate. This may sound foolish to you, but I once believed that sex could hold a man—that passion gave you power. Maybe if I had some of that power, it would give me an advantage over other women. What alpha wants an inexperienced virgin? I thought an older wolf could teach me how to be a good lover. It was such a mistake. My mother warned me not to make foolish choices, but did I listen? Lying to my father was one thing, but deceiving a Packmaster is a punishable offense.”
“What happened to the man?”
“My father kicked him out of the pack. The confrontation almost ended in bloodshed, but my mother’s a skilled mediator and talked sense into him. I don’t think the rest of the pack knows what really happened, butIknow what I did, and that’s enough. My father tried to protect my good name, but I don’t think he believes I’ll ever find a mate.”
“And this spineless coward never came for you? He didn’t fight for you?”
“He didn’t love me. Why would he have?”
Tak cursed under his breath. “What kind of man would sully a woman’s reputation?”
“Lakota fears it’ll happen again. That’s why I’m staying home alone instead of with my old pack while everyone’s out of town. I don’t know that I’ll ever regain their trust.” I stared at the empty bottle of water. “All for nothing. The sex wasn’t even nice.”
His hand felt heavy on my knee. “It rarely is the first couple of times.”
“I can’t imagine why so many women enjoy it.”
Tak’s fingers grazed my inside thigh, sending an unexpected flutter of tingles through my core. “Why do you say that?”
“It was painful and rushed. He made me nervous and self-conscious the whole time.”
Tak’s hand stroked higher, and when his knuckles brushed against the thin fabric between my legs, I trembled. “Do I make you nervous?”
My blood heated from his touch, and everything about him felt so right.
“You chose the wrong man,” he said, easing between my legs.
My skin tingled at the touch of his fingers. They explored beneath my shirt and circled over the fabric of my bra.
Tak’s eyes drank me in, and his words devoured me. “Will you let me show you how good it can feel?”
“What about my honor? People expect a woman like me to be courted before bedding a man.”
He stroked my cheek, and I leaned into him. “The man you gave yourself to didn’t realize what a precious jewel you are. Otherwise he wouldn’t have made your first time so terrible that you’ve given up on your desires. He should have pursued you in every way.” Tak kissed the corner of my mouth. “I want to show you what a beautiful, sexual wolf you are. As for courtship, you deserve a better man than me, so maybe this is the only honor I can give you.”
I wanted him. Yearned to know the feel of his weight. Tak sparked a fire in me, and in his arms, I felt like a woman.
