She nodded slowly. "That's a big decision."
"Not really. She's my mom."
"And you're sure this is about her? Not about proving something to your father, or to yourself?"
I'd been ready for this. Two and a half years of therapy and I knew where she'd push.
"Probably some of both." I shrugged. "I want to help but, sure, maybe part of me wants to be seen helping. Doesn't mean I can separate them completely. I know the difference now."
Dr. Schafer smiled. "That's good, Matthew."
"I've had practice."
"You have. So let's talk about the other part."
"What other part?"
"Elena."
I kept my face neutral. "What about her?"
"She's still in Millbrook."
"I know."
"Your parents mention her sometimes, don’t they? They’ve told you that she has a clinic there now, that she’s doing well."
"Yeah."
Dr. Schafer waited, but I didn't fill the silence.
"You've told me you always change the subject when they bring her up," she said. "Why's that?"
"Because there's nothing to talk about. That was three years ago. We've both moved on."
"Have you?"
"Yes." I held her gaze. "I have. I'm not going back for her. I'm going back for my mom."
"I'm not suggesting otherwise. But you'll see her. Millbrook's a small town."
"Probably. And it'll be fine."
"Fine."
"Yeah. We're adults. If I run into her, I'll be polite, she'll be polite, and… yeah, that's it."
Dr. Schafer studied me for a moment. I knew that look, the one she used when deciding whether to push or let it sit.
"You've never talked about her much," she said. "In two and a half years, you've talked about the affair, about Angela, aboutyour patterns. But Elena herself... you keep her at a distance, even here."
"Because she's not the point, right I'm the point. My choices were the point."
"That's true. But it's also a way of not looking at something."
"There's nothing to look at. I hurt her, she left. She built a new life. End of story."
"And you're okay with that."
