The thought made me take pause; I was too old to play this game. I was used to traveling through life, making my own choices.
“I wanted to talk with her.”
Frank hovered close, his green eyes squinting at me. “So you thought you could march on over here? Surprise her? There is nothing unexpected when it comes to Billy. How many times are you going to disappoint her?”
Swallowing my pride and a bit of my manhood, I spoke. “Listen, I’m sorry. This is new, you know? Well, you don’t, but it is. Dealing with a woman like Willa. I want to do this right, but I keep fucking up. Let me go see her, yeah?”
I tried to act reasonable and cool at the same time. Frank was all “Hollywood meets non-negotiable badass.” I was a doctor who delivered babies. If you didn’t know, a lot of people thought I was a softie. Fuck that…I wasn’t.
Frank cleared his throat, and a whiff of whiskey hit the air. Pretty certain I’d caught him in a vulnerable moment, I thanked any God.
“Consider this your last chance. Cats have nine lives, and you have three. Blow this and you’ll never get through again.”
I nodded.
He turned and started walking toward the elevators, and I followed silently.
“She’s in her room, sulking after seeing her brother’s happiness on the heels of your rejection. She’s been awake for two days, decorating Christmas trees, which means so have I. I don’t want any other problems today, you feel me?”
Another nod from me, and I waited for the doors to open. We walked down the hall toward the room Billy seemed to always occupy when staying here.
Frank knocked and opened the door quietly. “Bill? I have a visitor for you…”
“If it’s my mom, tell her I’m resting.”
“It’s not your mom,” I answered.
In a flash, Billy appeared. “Cal?”
“This okay?” Frank asked, a note of hopefulness tingeing his voice. I assumed he wished she would say no.
“It’s fine, Frank. You okay, Cal?” Her brow furrowed and she walked close but stopped within arm’s length. Her words flew out of her mouth in a string of syllables, and I hated that I’d put her in this position of anguish.
“All is fine. Well, it’s not. I came to apologize again. Apparently it’s my final chance.” I said the last part while giving Frank the side-eye.
He excused himself under Billy’s glare. “I’m going to go. I’ll be down the hall.”
We waited until the soft click of the door came, signaling we were alone.
“You just came by?” Billy eyed me, waiting for an answer as we stood there in the foyer.
“I did. I know it’s against protocol and all that, but I don’t give a shit.”
Billy took a step closer. We were inches from one another, our breath comingling, and I could see Billy’s chest rising and falling with every inhale and exhale. “You have this way of making me feel pedestrian. Normal—”
“You’re anything but pedestrian, Willa.” For the second time tonight, I used her God-given name. I wasn’t sure why, but it felt more intimate. This time as I interrupted her my hand reached out and took hers, threading our fingers together.
“I meant it as a good thing. Everyone treats me like a fragile doll or a bulletproof statue. No one treats me like an actual person with feelings and emotions that run hot and cold and everything in between. I’m not a statue or a china doll.”
My heart sped in my chest. I wasn’t sure how to respond. I certainly didn’t think Billy was anything close to basic, but she seemed to want me to believe she was. “You are very real. Maybe too much so…” I explained, leaning in and running my mouth over her cheekbone.
I had no clue why, but when I was with Billy things went from zero to seventy in a matter of seconds.
Billy hummed at the touch of my lips, and I asked, “Is this okay?”
“Yes.” Her voice was throaty and raw.
“Willa, you are my realest fantasy…if that even makes fucking sense. You’re who I’ve been dreaming about all my life, and here you are. Standing in the flesh, looking dreamy…”
