I blew out a long breath and pressed my palm to my forehead. The tension headache that’d started earlier had only grown worse.
“I told you, Ma. Gabriel wanted to spend some time with Diego so he picked him up from school.”
“But I’m listed as the emergency contact. How was he even able to take him from that place. He’s not on the contact list.”
I slowly blinked my eyes shut. Gabriel was on the contact list. He was the one who cut the check so Diego could attend Excelor Academy, and he’d demanded that his name be listed as an emergency contact on the list.
“I added him at the beginning of the school year. H-he’s making an attempt to get to know Diego better.”
“Hmm.”
I couldn’t even look at my mother.
“Well, I saw the news earlier. Your Carter was hanging outside of a building.”
I placed my hand over my chest. It physically hurt to even hear the mention of his name. It just took me back to remembering the pain in his voice when I broke things off over the phone. He masked it as anger. But I could hear it and that crippled me more than anything. I hadn’t even looked at my phone since putting it away earlier. I already knew what I’d see there.
“We broke up,” I stated just above a whisper. I was barely able to get the words out.
“What?” My mother looked at me oddly.
“I couldn’t keep seeing him. His job is too dangerous and I can’t put Diego through being hurt if something were to happen to him.” I decided to continue with the lie I’d made up in Gabriel’s office. It seemed to make the most sense. And though my mother and I had gotten closer in recent years, I just wasn’t ready to share the entire truth with her. Not with anyone.
“Michelle.”
I flinched at the way she said my name. Her tone was full of censure. Thankfully, Diego returned before she could go on.
“Here, baby, let’s get you set up with your graham crackers and milk.” My mother went to the kitchen while Diego sat down at the table.
“You want some, too, Mama?”
I smiled at my sweet baby boy. “No thanks, baby. You eat them. I’ll help you with your homework once you’re done.”
“’Kay,” he stated happily just as the graham crackers were placed in front of him.
“Let’s talk.” My mother came over to me, pulling me by my hand closer to the door, so Diego wouldn’t overhear.
“I’m worried about you,” she whispered, close to me. “You’re forgetting about Diego’s father picking him up. And now, you’re breaking up with a man who seemed to be really into you and your son. What’s going on? You’re not thinking of getting back with Diego’s father, are you?”
The question alone had me clutching my abdomen in horror. I closed my eyes and had to steady my breathing, remembering that my mother didn’t know the full story. To her, it might seem like I was now attempting to throw myself at Gabriel again.
“No, Mama. It’s nothing like that,” I stated low enough so only she could hear. I peeked over her shoulder at Diego. “It’s just that I have to look out for his well-being. Carter is a dare devil of sorts. An adrenaline junkie who loves the thrill of moving fast, saving lives, beating back fires. He’s great at it, but it’s dangerous and he could very well get hurt or die from it. I have to protect Diego from that outcome.”
“Or yourself.”
I blinked at my mother who was staring at me straight on.
“From what I saw of that young man, he loved you the same way he lived his life. And that may be what’s got you so scared.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. My mother was right to an extent. Carter loved with the same ferocious intensity that he lived. It was a thrill to be the center of that type of love. And yes, it did scare the hell out of me, but that wasn’t what was keeping us apart.
“You need to rethink your decision. I think that man is good for you. And more importantly, he’s good for Diego. He could be the father figure my grandson actually needs. Not some part-time, show up when he wants to father that he appears to have now.”
Again, I remained silent. My mother was right and I didn’t have a comeback save for the truth which I wasn’t spilling.
“Well, let me get out of here. Now that you two are home and okay, I am going to go get the manicure and pedicure I’ve been putting off for weeks now.”
I gave my mother a small smile. “Okay, Mama. Enjoy it.” I pressed a kiss to her cheek, feeling weakened when she wrapped her arms tightly around me. She stepped back and gave me a lingering look before going over to say good-bye to Diego.
