Rami shifts, stretching, pushing his ass against me. “You remembered,” he whines.
“Is it too much after everything we did last night?”
“Nhnn. Told you that lube is the good stuff.”
I chuckle, then palm his cock as I bottom out. Staying buried, I hug him closer, making subtle scooping and side-to-side motions with my hips, drawing out gasps and sighs from his perfect, petulant mouth. I flick a nipple, and he moans.
I’ve never agreed with the notion that one-night stands can’t be meaningful. Rather, I assume that spending only one night with a person allows for a little extra honesty. At no point have those arrangements ever felt less than, yet here, in my brightly lit alcove, I know this is different. Rami’s vulnerability, his willingness to give over his body, is more than I’ve ever had.
Last night, as we shared our secret sexual fantasies with one another, the daring hope in his eyes sprouted a network of roots that are still anchoring deep inside my chest this morning.
“I’ve never gone without a condom,”was my admission.“I want to, don’t know what holds me back.”
“I like giving up control,”he’d whispered, as though it were shameful, as though I hadn’t already read it all over his face.
“My favorite porn is size difference.”
He’d flushed, gesturing at the fact that he was a bit taller.“Sorry. Probably not what you meant.”
“That’s my favorite porn, Rahm. Not what I like in real life.”
“Oh.”
His blush had deepened, and I’d had to ask,“Does that mean your favorite porn is also something you’d like in real life?”
“Yes.”
“And?”
God, it’d taken him forever to admit, and I’d known it would be good.
“I… Do you know what somnophilia is?”he finally asked, the tops of his cheeks an endearing pink.
“Yes.”
“The porn isn’t usually that good—you can always tell the actor is really awake. But I sleep like the dead and have always wanted to wake up with someone inside me. Mid-fuck.”
“Like consensual non-consent?”I asked, sucking on his earlobe.
He shuddered.“Full-on CNC is a little too much for me, but also…kinda? It feels weird to admit, but I’ve been go, go, go for months, and in charge of all the decisions, and I just want to…not choose.”He ducked his head.“Does that make me a loser?”
“No. Now, shhh, sweetheart. Lie on your back and hold your knees for me like a good boy.”
When he shyly suggested the tests after that round, I suddenly couldn’t think of anything else.
It meant something that neither of us could wait to give the other what they secretly desired. It made me want to delve deeper. What other secret desires did Rami hold back from others? Would he share them with me? Would he let me explore them with him?
What does the man who has everything need from someone like me?
I tilt my hips, and he sucks in a sharp breath, shivering.
“I’ve never felt like this before,” he whispers, grabbing my arm and dragging it across his chest, melting against me.
“Me either,” I confess.
With a subtle tilt of his head, his eyes, those magical, brilliant eyes, meet mine as if searching for the truth. I lay soft kisses on his jaw, his cheeks, his temple, his eyebrow, his nose, anything I can reach.
I go deeper and deeper still, softly stroking his cock as his body violently strangles mine.
