“We’ll take care of your poor little bottom first,” he said with a teasing smile.
“All right.” Hunter closed his eyes. “It doesn’t hurt as badly as I thought it might.”
“You didn’t get that many licks.” Payne smoothed the cool salve on Hunter’s stinging skin, coating the welts generously. “They do look pretty, though.”
“Pretty?” Hunter raised his head, looking over his shoulder as best as he could, but he couldn’t see the marks. “You actually like how they look?”
“Of course I do,” Payne said in a tone that implied it should be obvious. “I put them there as decorations on your gorgeous ass. I hope you don’t think those were random blows. I practiced on a pillow for weeks when I first started Domming so I could land the cane exactly where I wanted it. I can’t draw for shit, but this is my artwork,” he said, gesturing to the welts.
Hunter felt a little surge of something he was loathe to call jealousy. He had no right to feel possessive of Payne, and no doubt his feeling stemmed from gratitude. He dropped his head onto his arms again. “I don’t mind being decorated. I suppose that’s obvious.”
“You’re an amazing canvas,” Payne said as he finished treating the welts. He put the salve aside and wiped off his hands, and then he picked up the bottle of water and opened it. “Here you go. There’s plenty more if you need it.”
“Thanks.” Hunter took the bottle, lifting it to his lips and sipping slowly. Then his thirst made itself known, and he tilted his head back and drained the bottle in several long gulps. “I was thirstier than I thought.”
“Do you want another? I’ve got some Gatorade too, if it would help,” Payne said, smoothing his hand along the back of Hunter’s head.
“Mm… no, I’m good for the moment,” Hunter said. “That feels good.”
“Is there anything else you want or need?” Payne continued stroking Hunter’s head tenderly. “More cuddling is included in that offer, so don’t feel awkward about asking if you feel the need for more contact. It’s not unusual.”
Part of Hunter wanted to refuse, to show he was strong enough to take care of himself. He could rebuild his walls, but the idea of cutting himself off from Payne didn’t appeal to him at all. No one, not even his mother, had taken care of him the way Payne had, letting him cry himself out and treating him as though it wasn’t a sign of weakness, but of strength. To be honest, hewantedthe cuddling, perhaps even more than he needed it.
“Only if you want to,” Hunter said somberly. “You’ve done so much for me, and I know you aren’t getting anything out of it. I can manage on my own if you don’t feel like doing it. I don’t want you to feel like I’m going to be an emotional leech.”
“Hunter, even if I didn’t like you personally, I couldn’t leave you hanging in the aftermath of a scene like that and call myself a responsible Dom,” Payne said, moving his hand down to rub Hunter’s neck soothingly. “But I do like you, and I want to be there for you through each step of the process. Iamgetting something out of it: the satisfaction of knowing I’m helping you.”
Hunter looked up at Payne through his lashes. “Well, if you really want to, I’d like it.” He felt his cheeks growing hot, which was unusual for him, and he blamed it on the aftermath of his emotional outburst.
In response, Payne crawled under the covers again and lay on his side, facing Hunter. Scooting close, he slid one arm across Hunter’s waist. “Do you want to be the big spoon or the little spoon?”
“Big spoon, or the salve will get all over your clothes,” Hunter said. He didn’t have much of a preference usually, but it appealed to him to wrap himself around Payne as though he were a stuffed toy.
“I’ve had a lot worse than a little salve on my clothes,” Payne teased, but he didn’t hesitate to turn over and nestle back against Hunter. Hunter wrapped his arm around Payne’s waist and pulled him close. He hadn’t held anyone this way in a long time, and it was comforting.
“You feel good,” Hunter murmured.
Payne wriggled closer and released a slow sigh, relaxing in Hunter’s arms. “So do you.”
“I’m glad.” Hunter meant it, and despite the emotional turmoil he’d been through and the lingering sting of the welts, he felt more at peace than he had in months. He was surprised, but he wasn’t going to question it; anything was better than the road he’d been headed down, and he could now see and admit, at least to himself, that the road had been leading him toward a bad end. But Payne had stepped in, and Hunter knew he was lucky Payne had been there and hadn’t given up on him. He wasn’t healed yet, but for the first time he thought that maybe, someday, he might get back to something approaching normal.
And he had Payne to thank for it.
Smiling slightly, Hunter closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep more easily than he had since his world had fallen apart.
